October 17, 2012 - Tyler Perry

  • Episode: 09011
  • (0)

Mitt Romney's Benghazi accusations backfire, two-parent households fix gun problems, Congressman Scott DesJarlais flip-flops on abortion, and Tyler Perry talks about "Madea."

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

>> WELCOME TOO THE REPORT, EVERYBODY.

>> THANK YOU SO MUCH.

>> THANK YOU SO MUCH, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

FOLKS, GOOD TO HAVE YOU WITH US.

HEY, HEY, LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING, EVERYBODY SEE THAT DEBATE LAST NIGHT? BUTN'T THAT GREAT? I MEAN, ROMNEY CLEARLY WON.

AND, FOLKS, I AM NOT JUST SAYING THAT, I AM SAYING THAT ON TV.

SO IF YOU'RE AN UNDECIDED VOTER WHO DID NOT WATCH, JUST TRUST ME, IT IS 2 AND 0.

EVEN THOUGH, EVEN THOUGH, FOLKS, THE NIGHT WAS CLEARLY STACKED AGAINST MITT.

AFTER THAT FIRST DEBATE DEBACLE, BARACK OBAMA HAD DEFINITELY WON THE LOW EXPECTATIONS GAME.

>> FOR OBAMA THE BAR IS RATHER LOW, COMPARED TO THE FIRST DEBATE ALL HE HAS TO DO IS STRING A FEW SENTENCES TOGETHER,

COHERENTLY TO MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH A SINGLE EXTENTIENT HUMAN AND SHOW THE SLIGHTEST ANIMATION IN HIS FACE.

>> Colbert: CHARLES KRAUT HAMMER IS RIGHT, LOW BAR, OBAMA'S LAST DEBATE PERFORMANCE WAS SO BAD .. THAT BAR WAS SET

AT CHARLES KRAUT HAMMER.

>> NOW, MITT, ON THE OTHER HAND, MITT, MITT ROMNEY, MUCH GREATER CHALLENGE.

>> WE ARE TOLD THAT THEY HAVE PRACTICED TO SUCH A LEVEL OF DETAIL THAT HE EVEN WAS PREPARING HOW HE SITS AND THERE

IS A GOOD REASON FOR THAT.

HE IS GOING TO BE SITTING ON A BAR STOOL AND MITT ROMNEY IS A MORMON, SO HE DOESN'T SPEND A LOT OF TIME ON BAR STOOLS,

ACCORDING TO HIS AIDES, BECAUSE HE DOESN'T DRINK.

>> Colbert: YES.

THAT IS TRUE.

THAT IS TRUE.

YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT.

ONLY PEOPLE WHO DRINK KNOW HOW TO SIT ON STOOLS.

THAT'S WHY, WHENEVER YOU SEE SOMEONE SUCCESSFULLY SITTING ON ONE, THAT IS AN EARLY SIGN OF ALCOHOLISM.

SEEK HELP!, PLEASE!

>> THE GUY FALLING OFF THE STOOL, THAT IS YOUR DESIGNATED DRIVER.

AND THAT IS WHY LAST NIGHT'S DEBATE, I HAVE TO TELL YOU, I MEAN, IT WAS SUCH A CHALLENGE FOR MITT.

LACK OF STOOL EXPERIENCE.

I MEAN, WHERE WOULD MITT HAVE SEEN ONE? HIS KITCHEN COUNTER? EVERYONE KNOWS THE ROMNEY FAMILY EATS STANDING AT PODIUMS.

BUT ONCE MITT MANAGED TO DOCK HIS BUTT WITH THE INTERNATIONAL STOOL STATION, JUST LIKE THAT, OH, THEN, THEN THE CANDIDATES

TOOK THEIR GLOVES OFF AND EVERYBODY KNOWS IT.

>> FIGHT NIGHT AT HOFSTRA, A HEATED SHOWDOWN.

>> FIGHTING, FIEPS CITY AND FIERCE.

>> LED TO HEAD IN A FIERCE FIGHT.

>> THE DEBATE TURNED INTO A FIGHT ON LONG ISLAND, I LOVED IT.

>> I LOVED IT TOO, YOU CRAVE THE BLOOD SPORTS JUST LOOK AT THEM DEBATE THE PRESIDENT'S COMMITMENT TO OIL EXPLORATION

ON FEDERAL LANDS.

>> HOW MUCH DID YOU CUT DRILLING ON FEDERAL LANDS?

>> I HAD A QUESTION AND THE QUESTION WAS HOW MUCH DID YOU CUT THEM BY? HOW MUCH DID YOU CUT THEM BY?

>> OW!

>> I CANNOT BELIEVE CANDY CROWLEY LET OBAMA WIELD THE FAN BLADED LURPA BUT

SHE LOOKED GREAT WITH THE NEW HAIR EXTENSIONS.

NOW, THEY TALKED ABOUT A LOT OF THINGS BUT EVERYBODY KNEW THAT MITT HAD ONE ACE IN THE HOLE, LIBYA GATE.

>> ROMNEY AND HIS RUNNING MATE HAVE BEEN HAMMERING THE PRESIDENT OVER THIS COVERUP FOR WEEKS.

AMERICANS ARE ASKING, WHAT DID THE PRESIDENT KNOW? WHEN DID THE PRESIDENT KNOW IT? WHICH ONE IS LIBYA? AND LAST NIGHT,

LAST NIGHT, LAST NIGHT, MITT HAD OBAMA IN HIS SIGHTS.

>> IT WAS A TERRORIST ATTACK.

AND IT TOOK A LONG TIME FOR THAT TO BE TOLD TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE, WHETHER THAT WAS SOME MISLEADING OR INSTEAD WHETHER WE

JUST DIDN'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED YOU HAVE TO ASK YOURSELF WHY DIDN'T WE KNOW.

>> THE SUGGESTION THAT ANYBODY ON MY TEAM, FROM THE SECRETARY OF STATE, U.N. AMBASSADOR, ANYBODY ON MY TEAM WOULD PLAY

POLITICS OR MISLEAD WHEN WE LOST FOUR OF OUR OWN, GOVERNOR, IS OFFENSIVE.

THAT IS NOT WHAT WE DO.

THAT'S NOT WHAT I DO AS PRESIDENT, THAT IS NOT WHAT I DO AS COMMANDER IN CHIEF.

>> Colbert: OKAY, OKAY, OBAMA LANDED A GOOD PUNCH, BUT THEN ROMNEY ASKED THE PRESIDENT THE QUESTION THAT WOULD CHANGE EVERYTHING.

>> I THINK IT IS INTERESTING THE PRESIDENT JUST SAID SOMETHING WHICH, WHICH IS THAT ON THE DAY

AFTER THE ATTACK HE WENT INTO THE ROSE GARDEN AND SAID THIS WAS AN ACT OF TERROR.

>> THAT'S WHAT I SAID.

>> YOU SAID IN THE ROSE GARDEN THE DAY AFTER THE ATTACK IT WAS AN ACT OF TERROR.

IT WAS NOT A SPONTANEOUS DEMONSTRATION? IS THAT WHAT YOU ARE SAYING.

>> PLEASE PROCEED, GOVERNOR.

>> I WANT TO MAKE SURE WE GET THAT FOR THE RECORD BECAUSE IT TOOK THE PRESIDENT 14 DAYS BEFORE HE CALLED THE ATTACK IN

BENGHAZI AN ACT OF TERROR.

>> GET THE TRANSCRIPT.

>> HE DID, IN FACT, SIR. SO LET ME CALL IT AN ACT OF TERROR --

>> CAN YOU SAY THAT A LITTLE LOUDER, CANDY?

>> HE DID CALL IT AN ACT OF TERROR.

>> Colbert: NO, NO, NO, NO, IT IS SUPPOSED TO CHANGE EVERYTHING THE OTHER WAY.

ARE YOU OKAY? LOOK, OBAMA DIDN'T ACTUALLY SAY ACT OF TERROR, DID HE, JIM?

>> NO ACTS OF TERROR WILL EVER SHAKE THE RESOLVE OF THIS GREAT NATION.

>> OKAY BUT ACTS OF TERROR COULD REFER TO ANYTHING.

I MEAN, HOW DO WE KNOW HE IS TALKING ABOUT BENGHAZI IN THAT BENGHAZI SPEECH THE DAY AFTER THE BENGHAZI ATTACKS? HE COULD

HAVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT BELOVED CHARACTER ACTOR BEN GAZZARA BECAUSE FOLKSILY TELL YOU THERE IS A SCANDAL THAT HE DOES NOT

GET MORE ROLES.

WHAT? GAZZARA IS DEAD? HAPPENED ON OBAMA'S WATCH.

>> FOLKS, THAT'S TRUE.

THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN MITT'S MOMENT OF CHEST THUMPING DOMINANCE OVER THE CARCASS OF HIS OPPONENT, AND IT WOULD HAVE

BEEN TOO IF IT HADN'T BEEN FOR THAT MEDDLING MODERATOR.

>> DID GOVERNOR ROMNEY HAVE TWO OPPONENTS ON THAT STAGE.

>> IT WAS DISGRACEFUL WHAT CANDY CROWLEY DID.

>> SHE INSERTED HER SELF AGAIN AND AGAIN INTO THIS DEBATE.

>> Colbert: CANDY STUCK HER NOSE INTO IT IN THE WRONG PLACE.

>> THE PROBLEM WAS THE TIME FOR FACT CHECKING IS AFTER THE EVENT, NOT DURING IT.

SHE MADE A GIGANTIC MISTAKE.

>> Colbert: YES!, YES! OH! I AGREE.

WE ARE ALL ANGRY, YES! THE TIME FOR FACT CHECKING IS AFTER THE EVENT, WHEN VOTERS HAVE STOPPED WATCHING.

WE SHOULD NOT BE SULLYING THEIR EMOTIONAL REACTION

ACCURACY.

AND FOLKS, IT WASN'T JUST THE MODERATOR WHO WAS TURNING THE AUDIENCE AGAINST MITT.

SO WAS THE AUDIENCE, WITH THEIR STUPID QUESTIONS.

RIGHT?

>> AND THE QUESTIONS.

11 QUESTIONS ASKED IN ALL, AND SOME OF WHICH WILL CERTAINLY BE DISCUSSED TOMORROW.

TOPICS THAT WE HAVEN'T HEARD MUCH ABOUT AT ALL IN THIS PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGN.

>> Colbert: YEAH.

STUPID VOTERS.

WHEN YOU ASK QUESTIONS THE CANDIDATE HAVEN'T HEARD BEFORE, HOW ARE THEY SUPPOSED TO GIVE THE ANSWERS WE HAVE HEARD FOR

MONTHS? AND JUST LISTEN TO THESE CRAZY SUBJECTS!

>> EQUAL PAY FOR WOMEN, IN FACT, THERE WERE A LOT OF WOMEN'S ISSUES DISCUSSED.

SOME MIGHT ARGUE IT WAS OBVIOUS PANDERING TO WOMEN.

>> Colbert: YEAH, OBVIOUSLY, OBVIOUS, PANDERING.

I AGREE WITH MELVIN KELLEY ON THIS ONE.

WHY, WHY ARE WE TALKING, WHY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT LADY ISSUES IN THE TOWN HALL? OKAY? SAVE IT FOR THE SADIE HAWKINS DEBATE

WHEN THE GIRLS ARE SUPPOSED TO DO THE ASKING.

AND THAT WASN'T THE ONLY OUT OF LEFT FIELD TOPIC NO ONE CARES ABOUT.

>> SEPARATE AND APART FROM EQUAL PAY FOR WOMEN WE HEARD A DISCUSSION ABOUT ASSAULT WEAPONS BANS.

>> WHY ARE THEY BRINGING UP ASSAULT WEAPONS? NOT NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO DISCUSS GUN CONTROL.

WE HAVEN'T HAD A MASS SHOOTING IN ALMOST 49 DAYS.

BUT MITT'S ANSWER, MITT'S ANSWER, FOLKS, GOT TO THE ROOT OF OUR SUPPOSED GUN PROBLEM.

>> WHAT I BELIEVE IS WE HAVE TO DO AS THE PRESIDENT MENTIONED TOWARDS THE END OF HIS REMARKS THERE, WHICH IS TO MAKE ENORMOUS

EFFORTS TO ENFORCE THE GUN LAWS THAT WE HAVE AND TO CHANGE THE CULTURE OF VIOLENCE WE HAVE.

BUT LET ME MENTION ANOTHER THING.

AND THAT IS PARENTS.

WE NEED MOMS AND DADS HELPING RAISE KIDS.

WHEREVER POSSIBLE THE BENEFIT OF HAVING TWO PARENTS IN THE HOME, AND THAT'S NOT ALWAYS POSSIBLE.

A LOT OF GREAT SINGLE MOMS, SINGLE DADS, BUT GOSH TO TELL OUR KIDS THAT BEFORE THEY HAVE BABIES THEY OUGHT TO THINK ABOUT

GETTING MARRIED TO SOMEONE, THAT IS GREAT IDEA.

>> Colbert: ABSOLUTELY.

ABSOLUTELY, FOLKS. THE ANSWER TO GUN VIOLENCE IS NOT GETTING RID OF ASSAULT WEAPONS IT IS A TWO PARENT HOME.

BECAUSE WHEN A PSYCHOPATH MARCHS INTO THE MALL IN KEVLAR BODY ARMOR, SLOWLY LIFTING THE LASER SIGHT OF HIS AK 47 TOWARD THE

SUNGLASS HUT, THE ONLY THING THAT WILL STOP HIM FROM CARNAGE IS WHEN HE ASKS HIMSELF, WHAT WOULD MOM

>> Colbert: BUT FOR ALL OF HIS TRIUMPH OVER THE GOTCHA QUESTIONS, THE UNFAIR UNRARES, THE SLIGHTLY TALLER CHAIRS, NONE

OF THAT IS HOW MITT WON THIS ONE .. NO, THIS FIGHT WAS OVER BEFORE IT BEGAN AS FOX NEWS.COM TRUMPETED ROMNEY SMOKES OBAMA IN

PREDEBATE COIN TOSSES.

>> YEAH.

ROMNEY SMOKED HIM.

HE WON THREE OUT OF FOUR COIN TOSSES.

WHAT ARE THE ODDS? LIKE ONE IN A MILLION?

>> COIN TOSS, ALWAYS A HUGE PART OF THE DEBATES SINCE THE LINCOLN DOUGLAS ROCK PAPER SCISSORS

WENDT ON FOR HOURS WITHOUT A WINNER THEY HAD TO SETTLE IT AND ENDED UP FLIPPING A PENNY AND LINCOLN WON BY CALLING ME! KNOW

THE FOUR FLIPS THAT LAST NIGHT WERE TO STAGING, ORDER OF QUESTIONING AND SPOUSES ORDER OF INTRODUCTION.

ROMNEY WON THE COIN TOSSES THE SAME WAY HE IS WINNING THIS ELECTION, BY CALLING HEADS OVER AND OVER AGAIN, THEN CALLING

TAILS LIKE HE ALWAYS HAS! FOLKS, THERE IS A GOOD SIGN, FOLKS, THIS IS A GOOD SIGN FOR ROMNEY'S CHANCES WITH UNDECIDED

VOTERS, BECAUSE IFFY POINT IN THE CAMPAIGN YOU ARE STILL UNDECIDED, JUST FLIP A GODDAMN COIN ALREADY.

WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK.

>> WE ARE BACK, THANK YOU FOLKS, THANK YOU, GENTLEMEN.

I HAVE SAID IT MANY TIMES ON THIS SHOW, ANY DOG CAN FATHER A LITER, BUT ONLY ALPHA DOG WILL DENY IT PUPPY SUPPORT.

IT IS TIME FOR MY ALPHA DOG OF THE WEEK.

THIS WEEK ALPHA DOG TENNESSEE CONGRESSMAN SCOTT DESJARLAIS.

THIS REPUBLICAN ROTTWEILER IS A STAUNCH FAMILY VALUES CULTURE WARRIOR WHOSE WEB SITE SAYS ALL LIFE SHOULD BE CHERISHED AND

PROTECTED AND RECENTLY DESCRIBED HIMSELF AS A CONSISTENT SUPPORTER OF PRO-LIFE VALUES.

NOW I HAVE BEEN VERY CLEAR ON WHERE I STAND ON THIS DIVISIVE ISSUE.

AND ANYONE WHO DISAGREES WITH ME SHOULD BE FAILED INTO A COFFIN FULL OF SPIKES.

>> WELL, DESJARLAIS RECENTLY PROVED HIS FLEXIBILITY BY LIFTING HIS LEG AND PEEING ON HIS OWN POSITION.

>> A PRO-LIFE TENNESSEE CONGRESSMAN CAUGHT ON TAPE, REPUBLICAN REPRESENTATIVE AND PHYSICIAN SCOTT DESJARLAIS HAD A

RELATIONSHIP WITH A PATIENT AND SHE BECAME PREGNANT.

>> Colbert: SHOCKING.

A CONSERVATIVE REPUBLICAN CONGRESSMAN WAS CAUGHT HAVING AN ILLICIT AFFAIR AND IT WASN'T WITH A MAN! WOOHOO! BUT FOLKS

THIS AFFAIR IS NOT NOW DESJARLAIS SHOWED HE HAS THE SWING SACK TO LEAD THE ALPHA PACK.

REPRESENTATIVE SCOTT DESJARLAIS DOESN'T DISPUTE A TRANSCRIPT OF A RECORDED PHONE CONVERSATION IN WHICH HE BEARS TO URGE THE WOMAN

TO TERMINATE THE PREGNANCY.

DURING THE CONVERSATION, DESJARLAIS AND THE WOMAN BICKERED BACK AND FORTH ABOUT HER GETTING AN ABORTION WITH

DESJARLAIS AT ONE POINT TELLING THE WOMAN, QUOTE, YOU TOLD ME YOU WOULD HAVE AN ABORTION.

NOW --

>> Colbert: BEFORE YOU JUDGE, BEFORE YOU JUDGE I SAID DESJARLAIS'S ACTIONS ARE ABSOLUTELY CONSISTENT WITH HIS BELIEFS.

HE IS STILL ADAMANTLY AGAINST ABORTION EXCEPT WHEN IT ENDANGERS THE POLITICAL LIFE OF THE FATHER, BUT, FOLKS THAT

STILL IS NOT LIKE DESJARLAIS IS MY ALPHA DOG, NO HE IS MY ALPHA DOG BECAUSE HE REPORTEDLY MADE THE TAPE OF THE PHONE

CONVERSATION HIMSELF TO PLAY FOR HIS WIFE, BECAUSE HE APPARENTLY THOUGHT IT WOULD HELP REPAIR THE MARRIAGE.

>> LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE ONLY WAY IT COULD HAVE BEEN ALPHA BALLSIER IS IF HE TOOK HIS WIFE TO A ROMANTIC SEASIDE

COTTAGE AND TOLD HER, HONEY, GUESS WHO I AM NO LONGER BONING ON THIS BED? BUT FOR SOME REASON, HIS WIFE STILL DIVORCED HIM.

BUT, LADIES, HE IS AVAILABLE! WELL, TECHNICALLY HE IS REMARRIED, BUT THAT HAS NEVER STOPPED HIM BEFORE! SO,

CONGRESSMAN DESJARLAIS, FOR GROWLING AT ABORTION AND THEN BEGGING FOR IT, YOU, SIR, ARE MY ALPHA DOG OF THE WEEK.

WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK.

>> Colbert: WELCOME BACK,

EVERYBODY.

IN MY GUEST TONIGHT IS A

PROLIFIC WRITER, DIRECTOR AND

STAR OF THE MEDEA MOVIES, PLEASE

JOIN ME IN SAVING HELLO TO TYLER

PERRY! IN SAYING HELLO TO TYLER

PERRY! TYLER, THANKS SO MUCH.

HOW YOU DO, BUDDY, GOOD TO SEE

YOU.

>> WE ARE VERY EXCITED HERE,

TYLER PERRY, THANK YOU FOR

JOINING ME ON TYLER PERRY

STEPHEN COLBERT'S INTERVIEW WITH

TYLER PERRY.

>> I LOVE IT, I LOVE IT.

>> Colbert: YOU LIKE AT THAT

NAMING THINGS AFTER YOURSELF.

>> ABSOLUTELY.

>> Colbert: I DO TOO, I GOT --

I GOT A TREADMILL ON THE SPACE

STATION NAMED AFTER ME.

DO YOU HAVE ONE OF THOSE?

>> NO, NO.

I HAVEN'T DONE THAT YET.

>> Colbert: I WENT IN --

>> GO AHEAD.

>> Colbert: THANKS SO MUCH.

NOW, YOU ARE ON THE FORBES LIKE

CELEBRITY POWER LIST, NUMBER 20,

BECAUSE YOU ARE A WRITER, A

DIRECTOR, AN ACTOR, A PRODUCER,

A PLAYWRIGHT.

IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU HAVEN'T FOUND

YOUR THING YET.

WHAT IS NEXT? SPOT WELDING?

WHY SO MANY THINGS?

>> I AM JUST TRAINED MYSELF

EARLY ON, I DIDN'T HAVE MUCH

MONEY SO I LEARNED HOW TO DO ALL

THE JOBS MYSELF AND I DON'T KNOW

HOW TO LET GOYETTE.

>> Colbert: REALLY? BUT WHERE

DO YOU FIND THE TIME FOR THE

WRITER, DIRECTOR, PLAYWRIGHT AND

AUTHOR, RIGHT?

>> YES.

>> Colbert: PROBABLY MOST

FAMOUS FOR PLAYING MEDEA.

THANK YOU FOR PLAYING THAT ROLE,

THERE ARE FAR TOO MANY GOOD

ROLES FOR OLD BLACK WOMEN.

ELDERLY AFRICAN-AMERICAN

ACTRESSES HAVE IT TOO EASY.

BY THE WAY, WHO EMPLOYS MORE

AFRICAN-AMERICAN ACTORS? YOU OR

EVERYONE ELSE IN HOLLYWOOD?

>> I HAVE GOT THEM BEAT, IT IS

ALL ME.

>> Colbert: REALLY?

>> IT IS ALL ME.

OLBERT: YOU HAVE GOT A NEW> C

MOVIE COMING OUT CALLED ALEX

CROSS.

IT IS A LITTLE BIT OF A

DEPARTURE.

>> YES.

A LITTLE BIT OF A DEPARTURE.

>> Colbert: LET'S DEPART.

>> LET ME SEE YOUR HANDS.

LET ME SEE YOUR HANDS.

BUTT DOWN THE GUN.

PUT DOWN THE WEAPON NOW, DO IT

NOW!

>> IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT TO DIE

DOING? DROP THE GUN? PUT YOUR

HANDS BEHIND YOUR BACK NOW, SIR!

>> Colbert: OH! IT IS REALLY

GOOD.

>> IT IS REALLY GOOD.

>> Colbert: IS IT A COMEDY?

BECAUSE IT LOOKED GOOD.

IT LOOKED SUPER ACTION Y.

>> THE REASON I ASK BECAUSE YOUR

MOVIES CAN GO ALL OVER THE

PLACE.

YOU ARE WATCHING A MA DEA MOVIE

AND ONE LAST MOMENT YOU ARE

LAUGHING AND THE NEXT YOU ARE

DEALING WITH SERIOUS ISSUES AND

THERE ARE HEARTRENDING HUMAN

DRAMA GOING AT THE SAME TIME.

WHY DO YOU STICK THE GUN THING

IN A MOVIE?

>> I USE THE CHARACTERS AS ME

DEMA DEA TWO, TO MAKE PEOPLE

LAUGH AND TALK ABOUT SERIOUS

ISSUES I THINK IT IS IMPORTANT

WHEN YOU ARE GIVEN THIS KIND OF

PLATFORM TO INSPIRE AND UPLIFT

THEM, THAT'S WHAT I TRY TO DO F

I TRY TO USE THE CHARACTERS TO

MAKE THEM LAUGH, RELAX A LITTLE

BIT AND PUT THE MESSAGE IN

THERE.

>> Colbert: DID YOU SAY YOU

USED MA DEA AS ANESTHESIA?

>> YEAH, YOU HEARD IT RIGHT.

>> Colbert: YOU ARE PUTTING

AMERICA UNDER AND YOU ARE

OPERATING ON OUR SOULS.

>> THAT IS SO GREAT.

>> Colbert: OKAY.

SO NOW YOU ARE THE BIG ACTION

STAR.

LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING.

YOU ARE A JOB CREATOR, RIGHT?

>> YEAH.

>> Colbert: YOU HAVE GOT --

YOU ARE LIKE BUDDY WITH OPRAH.

>> YEAH.

>> Colbert: LIKE I AM.

>> YEAH.

>> Colbert:.

>> I SAW THE INTERVIEW WHICH WAS

REALLY GREAT.

>> Colbert: I KIND KIND OF HER

BEST FRIEND.

>> SHE TELLS ME THAT ALL THE

TIME.

I AM PLAYING A BAD ASS YOU MAY

NOT WANT TO TELL ME THIS STUFF.

>> Colbert: BUDDY, OPRAH GAVE

ME A SET OF BEAUTIFUL KITCHEN

KNIVES.

YEAH.

SO DON'T MAKE ME CUT A TYLER

PERRY.

OKAY.

YOU PRAY AND BELIEVE IN FAITH.

>> I DO.

>> Colbert: SO I ASSUME AS A

MAN OF PRAYER --

>> I AM PRAYING RIGHT NOW,

ACTUALLY.

>> Colbert: ARE YOU A ROMNEY

GUY?

>> I HAVE GOT TO TELL YOU, THIS

IS WHAT I FOUND, BOTH OF THESE

DEBATES HAVE BEEN ABSOLUTELY

AMAZING.

MITT ROMNEY WAS AMAZING IN THE

FIRST ONE I THINK PRESIDENT

OBAMA WAS GREAT LAST NIGHT.

I AM TIRED OF IT, ACTUALLY, I AM

TIRED OF DEBATES AND TIRED OF

ALL OF THE NEGATIVE CAMPAIGN

LET'S JUST VOTE ALREADY, LET'S

EVERYBODY JUST GET OUT AND VOTE

AND MAKE IT ABOUT -- GET ALL OF

THE EDUCATION, GET ALL OF THE

INFORMATION, LEARN AS MUCH AS

YOU CAN ABOUT THE CANDIDATES AND

MAKE YOUR CHOICES.

>> Colbert: THERE IS ONE MORE

DEBATE, TYLER.

>> YEAH, I KNOW I HAVE TO SIT

THROUGH ANOTHER.

>> Colbert: YOU KNOW WHAT

WOULD MAKE THAT BETTER?

>> PRAYER.

PRAY FOR THE USA.

SHALL WE PRAY?

>> Colbert: YES.

>> YOU LEAD.

>> Colbert: DEAR LORD.

>> DEAR LORD, YES.

>> Colbert: PLEASE LET THIS

COUNTRY.

>> AND OUR LEADER.

>> Colbert: AND OUR LEADERS

AND LET ALEX CROSS OPEN HUGE IN

THE BOX OFFICE.

AND PLEASE, LORD, PLEASE, HELP

ME IN THANKING TYLER PERRY FOR

BEING HERE.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

THANK YOU.

TYLER PERRY! ALEX CROSS! WE

WILL BE RIGHT BACK.