June 15, 2011 - Keith Olbermann

  • Episode: 07078
  • (0)

Seniors face a shocking new threat, and Keith Olbermann returns to television.

>> Stephen: TONIGHT, HOW CAN

REPUBLICANS ATTRACT THE YOUTH

VOTE?

I SAY WE SPREAD THE RUMOR THAT

MITT ROMNEY IS A SEXY VAMPIRE.

AND THEN SENIORS FACE A SHOCKING

NEW THREAT, THEIR GRANDCHILDREN

MIGHT NOT BE THE SMARTEST, MOST

TALENTED CHILDREN IN THE WORLD.

AND KEITH OLBERMAN RETURNS TO

TELEVISION.

IT WILL BE THE WORST INTERVIEW

IN THE WORLD!

A 99-YEAR-OLD OREGON MAN JUST

GRADUATED FROM COLLEGE.

OUCH!

TERRIBLE TIME TO ENTER THE JOB

MARKET.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

>> Stephen: WELCOME TO THE

REPORT.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

[CROWD CHANTING STEPHEN]

THAT'S NICE.

THANK YOU SO MUCH, EVERYBODY.

WELCOME TO THE REPORT.

PLEASE --

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

, PLEASE, FOLKS, NATION, WITH US

TO HAVE YOU GOOD.

I'M SO OUTRAGED I CAN'T KEEP MY

SENTENCES STRAIGHTS BUT OUR

ENEMIES IN IRAN LED BY THEIR IF

A NAUTICAL AYATOLLAH KHOMEINI

HAVE PERPETRATED ANOTHER ATTACK

ON THE PEOPLE.

WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO INTERVENE

PRESIDENT OBAMA.

IRAN SUPPORTS HEZBOLLAH AND THEY

REFUSE TO WEAR TIES EVEN WHEN

FORMAL TIES ARE CALLED FOR.

THIS IS GARDEN ELEGANCE AT BEST

AND BORDERING ON CASUAL FRIDAY.

YOU MONSTER!

I'M SORRY I'M SO WORKED UP WITH

FASHION, FOLKS, IT'S JUST THAT

IRAN HAS IMPOSED A NECKLACE BAN

FOR MEN.

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE.

PEOPLE OF IRAN RISE UP, THROW

OFF YOUR CHAINS AND THEN THROW

ON YOUR CHAINS.

[LAUGHTER]

WITHOUT A NECKLACE HOW IS A MAN

SUPPOSED TO COMMUNICATE HISSER

HAVE RILITY?

A CHAIN IS THE UNIVERSAL

LANGUAGE THAT SAYS TO WOMEN,LY

NOT CALL YOU AFTER WE HAVE SEX.

[ APPLAUSE ]

FOLKS, AND THIS IS JUST THE

LATEST COMPONENT OF IRAN'S QUOTE

"MORAL SECURITY PLAN DESIGNED TO

COMBAT THE WESTERN CULTURAL

INVASION AND ENFORCED BY MORE

THAN 70,000 MORAL POLICE ON THE

STREETS. ".

THEY ARE LIKE THE FASHION POLICE

WHEN WOULD STONE THE FASHION

POLICE.

[LAUGHTER]

NOT ONLY HAS IRAN BAND

NECKLACES, THEY ARE ALSO

PROHIBITING SHORTS.

THAT'S RIGHT.

NOW THEY ARE ATTACKING DAISY

DUKE.

FOLKS, WE WE CANNOT LET THE IRANIAN

PEOPLE SUFFER ALIGN.

IT'S TIME TO TAKE A STAND.

-- SUFFER ALONE.

IT IS TIME TO TAKE A STAND.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

HOW YOU LIKE THE TATE OF THIS

YOU AHMEDINI-SHORTS?

EMBRACE THE WESTERN VALUE OF

SHORT SHORTS.

WHO KNOWS THE

A LOT LESS ANGRY IF HE GOT SOME

USAIR DOWN THERE.

[LAUGHTER]

NATION, EVERY DAY OUR ECONOMY

SINKS FURTHER TO WHAT COULD BE

CALLED A DOUBLE DIP RECESSION.

IT'S GREAT NEWS BECAUSE IT'S

GOING TO BE BLAMED ON BARACK

OBAMA.

>> SUDDENLY BARACK OBAMA LOOKS

MORE VULNERABLE THAN HE DID A

FEW MONTHS AGO.

>> PRESIDENT OBAMA IS A ONE TERM

PRESIDENT.

>> THE REPUBLICANS IF THEY PLAY

THIS RIGHT, THEY COULD RUN

LASSIE AND WIN.

>> EVEN LASSIE COULD BEAT OBAMA.

SHE WOULD NEVER GET THE

REPUBLICAN NOMINATION.

HELPING TIMMY OUT OF THAT WELL

IS SOCIALISM.

THERE'S STILL A FEW HURDLES TO

CLEAR BEFORE WE GET OUR COUNTRY

BACK FROM THE PEOPLE WE VOTED

FOR.

SEE, OBAMA OWNS THE YOUTH VOTE.

THE ONLY WAY KID KOZLOV HIM MORE

IS IF HE WERE A SKATE PARK.

THE G.O.P. BRAND IS ABOUT AS

POPULAR WITH KIDSES AS AN

EPISODE OF 60 MINUTES HOSTED BY

A TUBE OF SENODYNE.

>> IN THE 2008 CYCLE NONE OF

REPUBLICANS HEAVILY COURTED THE

YOUTH VOTE.

62% OF 18-29-YEAR-OLD VOTED

DEMOCRATIC.

>> WHAT THE REPUBLICANS DON'T

GET IS THAT THE ANTIGAY,

ANTI-IMMIGRANT, ANTI-MUSLIM

STUFF THEY PUT OUT IS TOXIC TO

THE UNDER 35.

>> Stephen: THAT'S RIGHT.

OLD MAN McCAIN WOULD BE

PRESIDENT IF I WASN'T FOR YOU

MEDDLING KIDS.

I DO NOT BUY THE ARGUMENT THAT

YOUNG VOTERS ARE TURNED OFF BY

REPUBLICAN IDEAS.

PRETTY MUCH EVERYONE HAS

DESCRIBED PAUL RYAN MEDICARE

CUTS AS RADICAL.

EVIDENTLY THESE YOUNG HOME BOYS

ARE TOO BUSY DOING THE MACK

RAINA WHILE LISTENING

THAN EZRA ON THEIR HEAD PHONES.

I'M HIP TO THE SCENE.

THERE'S A NEW WAY FOR

REPUBLICANS TO APPEAL TO

YOUNGSTERS AND IT'S THE SUBJECT

OF TONIGHT'S WORD.

SHOCK THE VOTE.

ONE CONSERVATIVE HAS FIGURED OUT

HOW TO REACH THE COVETED YOUTH

AUDIENCE.

KENNETH DELVECHIO, A FORMER PART

TIME NEW JERSEY JUDGE AND SENATE

CANDIDATE.

DELVECHIO OR D TO THE V AS NO

ONE CALLS HIM KNOWS THERE'S NO

WAY TO GET TO KIDS LIKE FINAL

DESTINATION, DRAG ME TO HELL AND

SEX IN THE STAY 2.

IT'S TERRIFYING.

TO APPEAL TO THE CHILDREN OUT

THERE HE WROTE AND PRODUCED A

PROLIFE HORROR FILM CALLED THE

LIFE ZONE.

>> YOU HAVE ALL COMMITTED A

TERRIBLE SIN.

I AM YOUR JAILER.

>> YOU ARE ALL ON THE OPERATING

TABLE.

ALL READY TO COMMIT MURDER.

>> YOU MUST --

>> YOU KIDNAPPED.

>> YOU WILL STAY HERE IN THISs

ROOM FOR THE NEXT SEVEN MONTHS

UNTIL YOU SIMULTANEOUSLY GIVE

BIRTH TO YOUR CHILDREN.

IT'S A MOVIE WITH ALL THE TERROR

OF KNOCKED UP.

THE LIFE ZONE IS ABOUT THREE

PREGNANT WOMEN WHO ARE HELD

CAPTIVE BY A SADISTIC JAILER WHO

TRIES TO CHANGE THEIR MIND ABOUT

ABORTION BY FORCING THEM TO

CARRY THEIR BABIES TO TERM.

AND FOLKS, JUST LIKE ALL GREAT

HORROR FILMS THE MOVIE HAS A

SHOCKING TWIST.

[LAUGHTER]

AT THE END -- AT THE END IT IS

REVEALED ALL ALONG THE WOMEN HAD

BEEN IN PERG TORY AFTER HAVING

DIED ON THE OPERATING TABLE OF

ABORTION CLINICS BUT THE FILM

ISN'T SOME KIND OF PREACHY RIGHT

WING SERMON.

HE EXPLAINED, I THINK THE

AUDIENCE WILL WALK AWAY NOT

KNOWING WHAT THE FILMMAKERS

POSITION IS.

IT GIVES BOTH SIDES OF COIN.

IT GIVES THE SIDE WHERE THE

WOMEN WHO HAVE THEIR BABY GOES

TO HEAVEN AND THE OTHER SIDE OF

COIN WHERE THE WOMAN WHO DOESN'T

GOES TO HELL.

THE VIEWER CAN CHOOSE WHO IS

RIGHT.

I BELIEVE HE IS ON TO SOMETHING

HERE.

YOUNG PEOPLE ARE BRAIN WASHED BY

POP CULTURE ALL THE TIME.

BUT I SAY --

[LAUGHTER]

-- IF THIS MOVIE WORKS WHY STOP

AT ABORTION.

HORROR MOVIES TARGETED TO YOUTH

AUDIENCES CAN PROMOTE ALL OF OUR

TRADITIONAL VALUES.

[LAUGHTER]

FOR INSTANCE, I FOR ONE WOULD

LIKE TO SEE A REMAKE OF CARRIE

WHERE SHE'S HOME SCHOOLED.

THAT WAY THERE'S NO PROM, NO

TAUNTING, NO BUCKET OF BLOOD AND

SHE GETS A FULL SCHOLARSHIP TO

LIBERTY UNIVERSITY.

[LAUGHTER]

OR HOW ABOUT --

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

I THINK THIS COULD GO PRETTY

WELL WITH THE KIDS, A MOVIE TO

CONVERT VEGETARIANS WHERE THE

AUSTRALIAN GUY FROM OUTBACK

STEAKHOUSE KIDNAPS A VEGAN,

IMPRISONS HIM INSIDE A COW AND

FORCES HIM TO EAT HIS WAY OUT.

OR --

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

OR A MOVIE THAT PROTECTS

TRADITIONAL MARRIAGE WHERE A GAY

GUY AND A LESBIAN ARE STITCHED

TOGETHER JUNK TO JUNK BY A MAD

MORALISTIC SCIENTIST UNTIL THEY

REALIZE HOW GOOD IT FEELS.

[LAUGHTER]

AND WHAT BETTER WAY TO SHOW THE

HORRORS OF UNIVERSAL HEALTH CARE

THAN WITH THE RELEASE OF TEXAS

CHAINSAW MEDICARE.

I DIDN'T WANT LEDGER FACE AS

MY -- LEATHER FACE AS MY PRIMARY

CARE PHYSICIAN BUT WITH OBAMA

CARE I DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE.

AND THE NEXT MOVIE WILL BE ABOUT

OUR NEW REPUBLICAN PRESIDENT.

THAT IS M

>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

FOLKS, YOU KNOW, IT'S NOT A

SECRET, I LOVE HELPING SENIORS.

THAT'S WHY I LIKE TO SET ASIDE

SPECIAL TIME ON MY SHOW FOR THEM

AND LIKE PHONECALLS TO MY NANA,

I ONLY DO IT TWICE A YEAR.

THIS IS STEPHEN COLBERT'S SENIOR

MOMENT.

♪ ♪

FOLKS, WE ALL KNOW THAT POT

SMOKING IS A MENACE AND NOT JUST

TO OUR NATION'S DWINDLING SUPPLY

OF EL FUDGE COOKIES.

BUT LOOK WHO IS OKAY TING NOW.

>> PRETTY MUCH THE LAST PLACE

YOU WOULD EXPECT TO FIND

HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE SMOKE POT BUT

SENIORS LIVING AT THE LAGUNA

WOODS RETIREMENT COMMUNITY ALSO

KNOWN AS LEISURE WORLD HAVE

FORMED A NONPROFIT MEDICAL

MARIJUANA COLLECTIVE.

>> THE THOUGHT OF NAUSEA

DISAPPEARS AND IT'S REPLACED BY

WHAT IS COMMONLY CALLED THE

MUNCHIES.

>> Stephen: OUR ELDERLY ARE

GETTING BAKED.

NO WONDER THEY ARE EATING DINNER

AT 4:00 IN THE AFTERNOON.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

FOLKS, WE CANNOT HAVE THE

GREATEST GENERATION BURNING

DOWN.

BEFORE YOU KNOW IT, THEY'LL BE

CROCHETING BLACK LIGHT PILLOW

AND TRYING TO SYNC UP PERRY C

CUOMO'S LIGHTLY LATIN.

SOON THEY'LL MOVE ON TO MEJ AND

IN ONE WILL KNOW BECAUSE THEY

HAVE ALREADY LOST THEIR TEETH.

FOLKS, AS ALWAYS I'M MOSTLY

WORRIED ABOUT HOW THIS WILL

EFFECT ME.

BECAUSE AS REGULAR VIEWERS KNOW

I'M A FRIEND OF FACTOR AND FORM

ER OATMEAL SPOKESPERSON

WILFORD BRIMLEY.

HE IS MY MENTOR.

I RECEIVED A DISTURBING

PHONECALL.

SINCE RECORD ALL OF MY CALLS --

IT'S FOR THE LAWSUIT -- I CAN

PLAY IT FOR YOU NOW.

JIM?

>> HELLO?

>> HEY, COLLEGE.

>> Stephen: WILFORD?

>> IT'S WILFORD BRIMLEY.

>> Stephen: ARE YOU OKAY?

>> I'M AS FRIED AS A CHURRO.

HAD SOME OF THAT MARIJUANA.

IT'S PRESCRIPTION.

IT'S FOR MY DIABETES.

DIABETES.

DIABETES.

DIA-A-BETES.

YOU EVER SAY A WORD SO MANY

TIMES IT LOSES ALL MEANING.

>> Stephen: I HAVE TO WORK

TOMORROW.

>> I WON'T TAKE ANY MORE OF YOUR

TIME.

WHAT DO YOU THINK GOES UP INSIDE

A DISH WASHER.

I'M THINKING ABOUT CRAWLING UP

IN THERE.

>> Stephen: DON'T.

SHOULD I SEND SOMEONE OVER

THERE?

>> NOT UNLESS THEY WANT TO SEE A

76-YEAR-OLD MAN EATING OATMEAL

IN THE BUFF.

THE GUY IN THE OATMEAL BOX IS

LOOK AT ME.

>> Stephen: I'M HANGING UP.

>> COLBERT, WAIT.

>> Stephen: YES?

>> I LOVE YOU.

>> Stephen: THANKS.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO -- WHAT IS

THAT NOISE.

>> (bleep).

I GOTTA GO.

I PUT A DVD IN MY TOASTER OVEN

TO REWIND IT AND NOW THE

BREAKFAST NOOK IS ON FIRE.

WHERE IS THE EXTINGUISHER?

PUT IT OUT WITH OATMEAL.

NOW THE OATMEAL IS ON FIRE.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

>> Stephen: KIDS, LISTEN TO

YOUR ELDERS, THEY ARE A FONT OF

WISDOM.

AND ELDERS, LAY OFF THE D

>> Stephen: BELL COME BACK --

WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY.

MY GUEST TONIGHT HAS HAD TV

SHOWS ON ESPN, MSNBC AND NOW

CURRENT TV.

I'M INTERVIEW HIM QUICK BEFORE

HE IS ON ANIMAL PLANET.

PLEASE WELCOME KEITH OLBERMAN.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

WHOO!

BOOM, BOOM, BOOM!

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

WHAT IS UP, MY MAN.

GOOD TO SEE YOU.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN, KEITH.

>> GOOD TO SEE YOU, CONGRESSMAN.

>> Stephen: THANK YOU.

SIR, WELCOME BACK.

>> THANK YOU KINDLY.

>> Stephen: TO TELEVISION.

THE CAMERAS ARE THE BIG THING.

I KNOW.

>> Stephen: SPEAK SLOWLY AND

CLEARLY INTO THE MIC.

>> I'VE MISSED IT SO MUCH.

>> Stephen: IS THIS YOUR FIRST

APPEARANCE ON TELEVISION.

>> NO, I WAS ON SOMEBODY ELSE'S

SHOW.

>> Stephen: LET'S SAY THIS IS

YOUR FIRST APPEARANCE ON

TELEVISION.

>> MEANINGFUL TELEVISION.

>> Stephen: ABSOLUTELY.

LET'S SEE IF YOU STILL GOT IT.

>> YOU TRIED TO TAKE IT FROM ME

I REMEMBER THAT AFTER THE LAST

SHOW --

>> Stephen: ALL RIGHT.

LET'S SEE IF YOU STILL GOT IT

FROM MY FRIEND.

HOW MANY DAYS HAS BUSH DECLARED

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.

>> A LOT.

>> Stephen: 2998.

>> I HAVE TO USE IT UNTIL

MONDAY.

>> Stephen: HOW LONG SINCE

YOU'VE BEEN ON THE AIR?

>> SINCE I HAVE BEEN ON HAVEN'T

BEEN?

>> Stephen: SINCE THE LAST

TIME?

>> JANUARY 21.

>> Stephen: HOW MANY DAYS,

KEITH.

>> LET'S SEE, NINE IN JANUARY.

>> Stephen: 145.

>> I'VE ENJOYED EVERY ONE OF

THEM.

>> Stephen: WHAT ARE YOU BEEN

DOING WITH YOURSELF?

>> I'VE BEEN AN EXECUTIVE.

I'VE BEEN IN CHARGE OF SETTING

UP THE NEW SHOW.

>> Stephen: YOU ARE A SUIT

NOW.

>> I'M A SUIT NOW.

>> Stephen: A ROBERT REDFORD

THING A TIE AND JEANS.

>> SOMEBODY HAD TO WEAR SOME

PANTS.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

>> Stephen: IT'S VERY COOLING

AND REFRESHING.

[LAUGHTER]

HAS IT BEEN PAINFUL IN THE LAST

145 DAYS TO LIVE WITH THE

KNOWLEDGE THAT BILL O'REILLY

WON?

[LAUGHTER]

BECAUSE O'REILLY STAYED ON THE

AIR AND YOU WENT OFF THE AIR.

AND SO, I MEAN, LET'S FACE IT

YOU WERE IN A FEUD, HE JACKED

YOU SO HARD YOU LANDED IN

CURRENT TV.

>> WELL, NECESSARY RESPONSIBLE

IN LARGE PART FOR MY PROMOTION

AND MY RAISE.

YES, IF I WANT TO GIVE HIM THE

VICTORY GO RIGHT AHEAD.

>> Stephen: YOU ARE BACK.

YOU ARE THE COMEBACK KID BUT

THAT IMPLIES YOU LOST.

ARE YOU MAN ENOUGH TO SAY

O'REILLY WON?

>> NO, OF COURSE NOT.

>> Stephen: YOU LEFT THE

PLAYING FIELD.

YOU FOR FITTED.

>> OKAY.

>> Stephen: DO YOU UNDERSTAND

SPORTS?

>> NOT REALLY, NO, OBVIOUSLY.

THAT'S WHY I LEFT SPORTS.

>> Stephen: TELL ME ABOUT

CURRENT TV.

IS IT DEDICATED TO ELECTRICITY

OR IS IT ABOUT TINY RAISINS?

>> WE DO A WHOLE SERIES ON

TELSA.

THE BAND SON THE AIR.

WE HAVE OUR SERIES.

THERE'S A WHOLE AC/DC THEME

THROUGHOUT THE DAY.

>> Stephen: HAVE YOU MISSED

BEING ON TELEVISION?

THERE'S BEEN HUGE STORIES OVER

THE LAST 145 DAYS.

>> LIKE WHAT?

SOMETHING --

>> Stephen: WE'RE AT WAR WITH

ANOTHER COUNTRY IN THE LAST 145

DAYS.

HAVE YOU MISSED REPORTING ON

THAT?

>> UNFORTUNATELY WE'RE ALWAYS AT

WAR WITH ANOTHER COUNTRY, AREN'T

WE?

SERIOUSLY --

>> Stephen: NO.

>> OKAY.

>> Stephen: HAVE YOU MISSED

BEING ON TV?

>> NOT PARTICULARLY.

IT'S NICE.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO SHAVE EVERY

DAY.

IF I DIDN'T THINK I WAS GOING TO

BE BACK ON TV EVENTUALLY I'M

SURE I WOULD HAVE MISSEDnb IT.

THERE'S ALWAYS ANOTHER ANTHONY

WEINER COMING DOWN THE LINE

HERE.

THERE'S ALWAYS ANOTHER STORY.

THE ONLY THING THAT ENDED IN THE

LAST 145 DAYS WAS BIN LADEN'S

HEART

HEARTBEAT.

EVERYTHING ELSE THERE'S ANOTHER

STORY COMING DOWN THE LINE.

>> Stephen: THAT WAS A BIG

STORY.

YOU DIDN'T GET TO COVER IT.

>> I'M SURE THERE WILL BE OTHER

BIG STORIES.

>> Stephen: CURRENT TV IS WHAT

CHANNEL IN EVERY CITY?

>> WE'RE 103 HERE IN MANHATTAN

AND 37-SOMETHING ON DISH.

358 ON DIRECT.

>> Stephen: IS AL GORE'S

NETWORK.

>> AL GORE IS MY BOSS.

>> Stephen: HOW MANY OF YOUR

CAMERAS RUN BY WIND POWER.

>> THE ONE I USE DIRECTLY,

THAT'S HAND CRANKED.

I HAVE TO HIT IT UNDER THE DESK.

>> Stephen: DO YOU HAVE

EDITORIAL CONTROL?

>> YES, I DO.

>> Stephen: DID YOU NOT HAVE

EDITORIAL CONTROL BEFORE?

>> I I KIND OF DID BUT NOW I DO.

>> Stephen: THIS IS THE

COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMAN

2.0?

WERE YOU IN ANYWAY FETORRED AT

MSNBC THAT YOU WILL NOT BE NOW?

>> I THINK IT WAS COMING TO THAT

I'M NOT GOING TO SAY THEY SHUT

ME DOWN.

>> Stephen: WHY ARE YOU SO

HARD TO WORK WITH?

[LAUGHTER]

YOU ARE UNIVERSALLY REGARDED AS

INSANE.

[LAUGHTER]

WHY ARE YOU SO DIFFICULT, YOU

KEEP LEAVING PLACES.

>> TO GET BETTER JOBS.

WHAT IS INSANE ABOUT THAT?

I'VE HAD NINE FULL TIME EMPLOYER

S IN MY CAREER AND THREE

OF THEM REHIRED ME SO A THIRD OF

THEM BROUGHT ME BACK.

>> Stephen: IMPRESSIVE.

YOU ARE ONE FOR THREE.

>> THAT'S RIGHT.

>> Stephen: WHERE DO YOU FALL

IN THE LINEUP OF CURRENT TV?

>> AS WE MOVE TOWARDS BEING ALL

NEWS AND INFORMATION AND OPINION

AND COMONT TEARY I'M THE FIRST

SHOW.

AND THEN THERE'S GOING TO BE

OTHER SHOWS THAT WILL BE

SOMEWHAT SIMILAR TO MINE IN THE

FUTURE.

>> Stephen: IT'S GOING TO BE

WALL-TO-WALL KEITH OLBERMAN.

>> OATH THREE HOURS A DAY.

RIGHT AFTER OUR SHOW IS THE

DOCUMENTARY SERIES VANGUARD

WHICH IS SAY SUPERIOR PROGRAM

THAT HAS WON A LOT OF AWARDS, A

LOT OF INTERNATIONAL PROGRAMMING

AND ALMOST NO PRISON

DOCUMENTARIES.

>> Stephen: THAT IS ONE THING

MSNBC IS GOING TO HAVE ON YOU.

ON A FRIDAY NIGHT THERE'S

NOTHING LIKE BETTER THAN

WATCHING 72 HOURS OF CRUEL

BEATING AND SODOMY.

KEITH OLBERMAN THANKS FOR COMING

ON.

"COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMAN"

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

>> Stephen: THAT'S IT FOR THE

REPORT.

GOOD