StePhest Colbchella '013 - Disco Decepticons

  • Aired:  08/07/13
  •  | Views: 109,511

The indie music site Pitchfork questions Stephen's honesty about Daft Punk being a no-show. (3:40)

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

>> Stephen: WELCOME TO THE

SHOW, EVERYBODY.

WELCOME TO THE REPORT.

GOOD TO HAVE YOU WITH US.

>> STEPHEN!

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN!

>> Stephen: THANK YOU SO MUCH

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).

THANK YOU, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

NATION, LET'S GET STRAIGHT TO

THE TOP STORY TONIGHT-- ME.

( LAUGHTER )

THE WORLD IS ABUZZ OVER LAST

NIGHT'S SHOW.

IT WAS MY THIRD ANNUAL

COLBCHELLA CONCERT SERIES AND IT

WAS WITHOUT A DOUBT THE THIRD

TIME WE HAVE DONE IT.

( LAUGHTER )

MY STAR-STUDDED VIDEO TRIBUTE TO

THE SONG OF THE SUMMER LIT UP

THE TWITTERSPHERE, THOUGH I DO

HAVE TO SAY, I AM A LITTLE HURT

THAT NOT NEARLY ENOUGH PEOPLE

HAVE CONGRATULATED ME ON THE

HEIGHT OF MY CHORUS LINE KICK

WITH THE ROCKETTES.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).

YES.

I AM DEEPLY HURT IN THAT I

BELIEVE I TORE MY HAMS STRING.

( LAUGHTER )

NOW, FOLKS, IF YOU WEREN'T HERE

LAST NIGHT, YOU'RE PROBABLY IN

DAFT PUNK.

( LAUGHTER )

THESE GUYS-- THEY WERE A NO-SHOW

BECAUSE OF AN ALLEGED EXCLUSIVE

AGREEMENT TO APPEAR ON MTV, I

ASSUME BECAUSE THEY'RE 16 AND

PREGNANT.

( LAUGHTER )

BUT IT TURNS OUT, IT TURNS OUT--

THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT-- BUT IT

TURNS OUT, AS I EXPLAINED IN

MINUTE DETAIL LAST NIGHT, THAT

ARE SURPRISE GUESTS AT THIS

YEAR'S VMA'S, SO REMEMBER TO ACT

SURPRISED.

BUT IT ALL TURNED OUT GREAT

BECAUSE ROBIN THICKE SHOWED UP

AT THE LAST MINUTE TO KICK IT

WILD STYLE.

END OF STORY, OR SO I THOUGHT.

UNTIL SOME SHARP-EYED

JOURNALISTS OVER AT THE INDY

MUSIC SITE PITCHFORK QUESTIONED

THE HONESTY OF MY EXPLANATION

SARCASTICALLY USING, "MAYBE

ROBIN THICKE, HIS DANCERS AND

BAND WERE ABLE TO PULL OFF AN

ELABORATE PERFORMANCE TWO HOURS'

NOTICE OR MAYBE IT WAS THE PLAN

ALL ALONG, AN ELABORATE FAKE-OUT

TO PROMOTE DAFT PUNK'S

APPEARANCE ON THE VMA'S.

I GOT ONE THING TO SAY TO

PITCHFORK-- BUSTED!

YOU GOT ME!

THEY'RE GOOD.

WE THOUGHT WE TRICKED YOU BY

FLYING IN THE DISCO DECEPTICONS

FROM PARIS IN A IT SOPHISTICATE

PANTOMIME TO FOOL EVERYONE, EVEN

MYSELF, SO COMMITTED WAS I.

THAT DAFT PUNK WAS COMING.

ALL-- ALL JUST TO HELP SOMEONE

ELSE'S SHOW ON ANOTHER NETWORK A

MONTH FROM NOW.

( LAUGHTER )

BUT WE CAN'T PUT ONE PAST YOU,

PITCH FORNG.

OH, WHAT A LOAD OFF.

THE GUILT WAS KILLING ME.

AND NOW THAT I'VE COME CLEAN, I

CAN JUST DO WHAT I LOVE, PROMOTE

THE VMAs.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).

WHICH ONCE AGAIN-- THANK YOU.

IT'S MY CALLING.

ONCE AGAIN, THE VMAs THE

APPEAR ON THE OPRAH WINFREY

NETWORK, FOLLOWING THE PREMIERE

OF "HYSTERECTOMY HORRORS" WITH

HOST LOU DIAMON