The Word - Hear No Evil

  • Aired:  06/07/11
  •  | Views: 49,888

Rand Paul's approach to identifying terrorists is perfectly consistent with his libertarian constitutional ideals. (4:45)

(LAUGHTER)

NATION, IT'S CLEAR PRESIDENT

OBAMA IS NOT COMMITTED TO THE

WAR ON TERROR.

TERRORISTS ARE ALL AROUND US AND

WE DON'T KNOW WHO THEY ARE.

SO FAR WE'VE BEEN LUCKY TO STOP

THE TIMES SQUARE BOMBER AND THE

UNDERWEAR BOMBER WHEN THEIR

PLOTS FAILED.

BUT IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME

BEFORE TERRORISTS ACQUIRE

NON-IDIOT TECHNOLOGY.

(LAUGHTER)

NOW, LUCKILY, THERE'S A WAY WE

CAN IDENTIFY TERRORISTS BEFORE

IT'S TOO LATE AND IT'S THE

SUBJECT OF TONIGHT'S WORD.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

HEAR NO EVIL.

NATION, EVERYBODY KNOWS I'M ON

RECORD THAT THE TO PROTECT US

FROM TERROR WE NEED TO USE

RACIAL PROFILING.

THAT DOESN'T MAKE ME RACIST

BECAUSE I DON'T SEE RACE.

PEOPLE TELL ME I'M WHITE AND I

BELIEVE THEM BECAUSE I THINK WE

NEED TO USE RACIAL PROFILING.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT KENTUCKY SENATOR RAND PAUL

HAS A WAY TO IDENTIFY TERRORISTS

WITHOUT PROFILING AS HE

EXPLAINED ON THE RADIO'S "SEAN

AND HANNITY."

>> I'M NOT FOR PROFILING PEOPLE

ON THE COLOR OF THEIR SKIN

RRELIGION BUT IF SOMEONE ISO

ATTENDING SPEECHES FROM SOMEONE

PROMOTING THE VIOLENT OVERTHROW

OF OUR GOVERNMENT, THAT'S AN

OFFENSE WE SHOULD BE GOING

AFTER.

THEY SHOULD BE DEPORTED OR PUT

IN PRISON.

>> Stephen: AND THAT IS

PERFECTLY CONSISTENT WITH RAND

PAUL'S LIBERTARIAN

CONSTITUTIONAL IDEALS.

AFTER ALL THE BILL OF RIGHTS

GUARANTEES FREEDOM OF SPEECH,

NOT FREEDOM OF LISTEN.

(LAUGHTER)

AND IT IS POSSIBLE...

(LAUGHTER).

IT IS CLEARLY POSSIBLE TO BE

RADICALIZE BID HEARING JUST ONE

SPEECH BECAUSE RADICALS ARE LIKE

KATY PERRY, YOU HEAR HER NEW

SONG, YOU SWEAR YOU DON'T LIKE

IT THEN THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW

YOU'RE SINGING "TEENAGE DREAM"

IN FRONT OF YOUR INTERNS AND YOU

JUST BOUGHT YOURSELF A

COURT-ORDERED APOLOGY.

(LAUGHTER)

AND, YES, I AM SAYING THAT KATY

PERRY IS A TERRORIST.

HOW ELSE DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS?

(LAUGHTER)

I DON'T KNOW WHAT KIND OF BOMB

THAT IS, BUT I SURE FEEL DIRTY.

(LAUGHTER)

AND REVOLUTIONARY SPEECH CAN

TURN UP ANYWHERE, FOLKS.

AT A RADICAL CHURCH.

>> GODDAMN AMERICA!

>> Stephen: OTT THE OSCARS.

>> WE LIVE IN FICTITIOUS TIMES.

WE LIVE A TIME WHERE WE HAVE

FICTITIOUS ELECTION RESULTS THAT

ELECT A FICTITIOUS PRESIDENT.

>> Stephen: EVEN KENTUCKY'S

KNOB CREEK MACHINE GUN SHOOT.

THE NAME EVOKES A SIMILAR TIME

WHEN GRANDMA WOULD ROCK ON THE

PORCH FIRING 500 ROUNDS A MINUTE

FROM HER BROWNING M-1917 MACHINE

GUN.

TO ONE FORGETS TO CALL HER ON

HER BIRTHDAY.

(LAUGHTER)

AND, FOLKS, AT...

(APPLAUSE).

AT THE KNOB CREEK MACHINE GUN

SHOOT, YOU CAN SHOP FROM VENDORS

SELLING A WIDE VARIETY OF GUNS,

EVEN FLAME THROWER RENTALS.

YOU NEVER WANT TO BUY A FLAME

THROWERS, OF COURSE, IT'S JUST

GOING TO BE A NEWER MODEL NEXT

YEAR.

IT'S LIKE APPLE.

(LAUGHTER)

PLUS, AT THE KNOB CREEK MACHINE

GUN SHOOT, THERE'S VENDORS

SELLING MILITIA HANDBOOKS AND

NAZI PAR A YALE YA WITH PRICES

SO LOW EVERYDAY IS A WHITE SALE.

(LAUGHTER)

UNFORTUNATELY THIS HARMLESS

GATHERING OF WEAPONS ENTHUSIASTS

HAS BEEN MARRED BY SPEECHES

ADVOCATING THE OVERTHROW OF THE

GOVERNMENT.

FOR EXAMPLE, IN APRIL 2010, THE

NOT AT ALL ANTI-SEMITIC

CHRISTIAN PATRIOT METAL BAND

POKER FACE PLAYED KNOB CREEK AND

THE BAND'S LEAD SINGER, TOM TOE

PETTY DECLARED OBAMA IS

BASICALLY THE EXCLAMATION POINT

ON THE TAKEOVER OF THE UNITED

STATES.

TOO MANY OF US ARE WAKING UP AND

TOO MANY OF US ARE HEAVILY

ARMED.

THEY ARE GOING TO PUSH AND WE

ARE GOING TO SHOVE BACK.

THE SECOND AMERICAN REVOLUTION

WILL COMMENCEMENT SCARY STUFF.

AND BY RAND PAUL'S LOGIC, ANYONE

THERE TO HEAR THEM SHOULD BE

ARRESTED.

F.B.I., YOU'RE GOING TO WANT TO

ARREST THIS GUY.

(LAUGHTER)

ARREST THIS GUY.

AND ARREST... WAIT A MINUTE,

JIMMY, FREEZE!

ENHANCE!

THAT'S RAND PAUL!

(LAUGHTER)

(APPLAUSE)

SENATOR RAND PAUL WHO, ON HIS

OWN WEB SITE, ADMITS HE WAS

THERE.

AND FACE IT, BEING A TERRORIST

MAKES MORE SENSE THAN HIS

PREVIOUS COVER STORY, THAT HE'S

AN OPHTHALMOLOGIST.

OH, MY GOD!

(LAUGHTER)

SO IF YOU SEE THIS DANGEROUS

FUGITIVE, PLEASE CALL THE

AUTHORITIES.

BUT FIRST, PUT IN SOME EARPLUGS

BECAUSE IF YOU HEAR ANYTHING HE

HAS TO SAY, RAND PAUL SAYS WE

HAVE TO ARREST YOU, TOO.

AND THAT'S THE