Obamacare & Pizza Costs

  • Aired:  08/08/12
  •  | Views: 134,832

Consumers should be willing to swallow a less than 1% increase in Papa John's prices since they are willing to swallow Papa John's pizza. (3:43)

>> Stephen: WELCOME TO THE REPORT, EVERYBODY.

>> STEPHEN!

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN!

>> Stephen: GOOD TO HAVE YOU WITH US.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

FOLKS, LET'S GET RIGHT TO IT.

SO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT TONIGHT.

FOR YEARS NOW, I HAVE BEEN WARNING ABOUT THE LOOMING DANGERS OF OBAMACARE.

I SOUNDED THE ALARM ABOUT DEATH PANELS, NOBODY LISTENED.

I TOLD YOU ABOUT RATIONED CARE BUT IT FELL ON PREVENTABLY DEAF EARS.

BUT STILL, STILL, THE TERRIFYING MENACE OF AFFORDABLE HEALTH CARE DRAWS EVER CLOSER, BUT TODAY,

AMERICANS FINALLY GOT THE WAKE-UP CALL FROM ONE SOURCE THEY CAN STILL TRUST-- THEIR PIZZA.

( LAUGHTER ) JIM.

>> WILL OBAMACARE MAKE YOUR PIZZA MORE EXPENSIVE?

>> C.E.O. OF PAPA JOHN YESTERDAY, CAME OUT AND SAID, IN 2014 "OUR BEST ESTIMATE IS THAT

THE OBAMACARE WILL COST ABOUT 11 TO 14 CENTS PER PIZZA.

>> Stephen: 14 CENTSS!

THAT'S THREE TIMES THE VALUE OF A PAPA JOHN'S PIZZA.

( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE ) FOLKS, FOLKS.

I LOVE IT.

I LOVE IT, TOO.

DELICIOUS.

IT'S NO WONDER PAPA JOHN'S FOUNDER JOHN SCHNATTER, OR AS THEY CALL HIM IN HIS NATIVE

ITALY, JOHNNY SCHNATS, IS A MITT ROMNEY SUPPORTER WHO SPONSORED A FUND-RAISER AT HIS HOME WHICH IS

A SCALE MODEL OF LUXEMBOURG.

THEY SERVED ROMNEY'S FAVORITE PIE, HOLD THE CHEESE, HOLD THE SAUCE, EXTRA DOUGH.

STILL SPICY FOR MITT.

I'M SURE YOU'RE SAYING, 14 CENTS.

STEPHEN, THAT'S NOT EVEN 1% OF THE COST OF A LARGE PIE.

PEOPLE WILL BE WILLING TO SWALLOW THAT.

AFTER ALL, THEY'LL BE WILLING TO SWALLOW THIS.

WRONG, WRONG!

PEOPLE WILL NOT PAYURE CENT BECAUSE WHEN YOU ORDER A PAPA JOHN'S PIZZA, IT'S ONLY AFTER

YOU'VE REACHED A STATE OF SUCH DESPERATE GNAWING HUNGER THAT YOU WOULD EAT THE ASS OFF A

RACCOON THAT DROWNED IN YOUR BIRD BATH.

AND EVEN THEN, AND EVEN THEN,

ONLY AFTER MAKING ABSOLUTELY SURE THAT YOU'RE ALL OUT OF DROWNED RACCOON ASS.

AND NOW OBAMA EXPECTS TO YOU SHELL OUT ALMOST THREE EXTRA NICKEL FOR THIS PIE.

EAT THE NICKELS.

YOU HAVE YOUR DIGNITY.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) RIGHT?

AM I RIGHT?

NOW, PERSONALLY, NOW, PERJURILY,

I LOVE PAPA JOHN'S PIZZA.

I BELIEVE THEY'RE A SPONSOR.

ORDER SOME RIGHT NOW.

I WILL WAIT WHILE YOU PAUSE YOUR D.VR.

DON'T GET ME WRONG, FOLKS.

I BELIEVE EVERY HUMAN BEING HAS A FUNDAMENTAL RIGHT TO AFFORDABLE HEALTH CARE, BUT AT WHAT PRICE?

THERE HAS TO BE A LINE WE DO NOT CROSS.

AND IT'S 14 CENTS.

( LAUGHTER ) BECAUSE IF WE JUST SIT IDLY BY WHILE EVERYONE GETS ACCESS TO A

DOCTOR, TODAY IT'S JUST 14 CENTS MORE A PIZZA.

TOMORROW IT COULD BE THREE CENTS MORE A TACO.

AND I WOULD RATHER BE

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