Tip/Wag - Ted Cruz & Led Zeppelin

  • Aired:  06/12/14
  •  | Views: 55,980

Senator Ted Cruz officially becomes 100% American, and Led Zeppelin faces a plagiarism lawsuit for "Stairway to Heaven." (6:35)

NATION, IN MY HUMBLE OPINION,THERE'S NOTHING HUMBLE ABOUT MY

OPINION.

THIS IS TIP OF THE HAT, WAG OFTHE FINGER.

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]FIRST UP, FOLKS, IT'S NO SECRET

THAT I HAVE ALWAYS FELT A DEEPCONNECTION WITH TEXAS SENATOR

AND JOE McCARTHY TRIBUTE HEADTED CRUZ.

[LAUGHTER]THERE'S ONE THING ABOUT SENATOR

CRUZ THAT BOTHERS ME.

IT'S HIS NAME, RAFAEL EDWARDCRUZ.

IT SOUNDS KIND OF, YOU KNOW,CANADIAN.

[LAUGHTER]IT TURNS OUT I HAVE EXCELLENT

CANADAR.

>> SENATOR TED CRUZ HASRENOUNCED HIS CANADIAN

CITIZENSHIP.

THE TEXAS REPUBLICAN WAS BORNNORTH OF THE BORDER.

HE DISCOVERED HE HELD DUALSHIPLAST YEAR.

>> TED CRUZ NOW OFFICIALLYALL-AMERICAN, SHEDDING HIS

CANADIAN CITIZENSHIP.

>> Stephen: SO A TIP OF THEHAT TO SENATOR CRUZ FOR HIS

GREAT SHOW OF PATRIOTISM.

IF YOU ASK ME, THERE'S NOTHINGMORE AMERICAN THAN NOT BEING

FROM ANOTHER COUNTRY.

WHICH IS WHY IT'S SO HARD FOR METO ALSO GIVE TED CRUZ A WAG OF

MY FINGER, BECAUSE THE WAY TEDCRUZ WENT ABOUT BECOMING A

NOT-CANADIAN WAS SO CANADIAN.

HIS CANA-DECTOMY WAS PERFORMEDWITH A SIMPLE CERTIFICATE OF

RENUNCIATION ISSUED BY THEGOVERNMENT.

A CERTIFICATE JUST SAYING HE'SNOT CANADIAN.

HELL, I GOT THOSE.

THE PRINTER IN MY OFFICE CHURNS'EM OUT 24/7.

I EVEN GOT A TWO-PLY VERSION INTHE BATHROOM.

COME ON, SENATOR, NO PIECE OFPAPER CAN WIPE THE CANADA OFF

YOU.

I'VE VISITED TORONTO ONCE 20YEARS AGO AND EVERY NOW AND THEN

I STILL SAY I'M SORRY.

NO, TO BECOME 100% AMERICAN, TEDCRUZ NEEDS TO DO SOMETHING

RADICALLY UNCANADIAN.

HE NEEDS PUNCH A MOOSE OR PAYFOR HIS OWN HEALTH CARE.

AND I CAN HELP.

I CAN HELP.

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]I'M HERE TO HELP BECAUSE I'M A

TRAINED LUDOVICO THERAPIST.

I'VE ADMINISTERED CANADIANDEPROGRAMMING BEFORE.

JIM?

[SCREAMING]♪ IT'S BEEN ONE WEEK YOU LOOKED

AT ME♪ DROPPED YOUR ARMS TO YOUR

SIDES AND SAID I'M SORRY>> STOP IT! THIS IS SICK!

>> Stephen: NOW THANKS TOCONDITIONING, EVERY TIME HE

HEARS CELINE DION, HE BECOMESNAUSEOUS, LIKE A TRUE AMERICAN.

NEXT UP, FOLKS, I AM A HUGE FANOF LED ZEPPELIN.

I AM A SUCKER FOR THEIR UNIQUEMIX OF BLUES, ROCK AND DRUIDS,

WHICH IS WHY I AM SO ANGRY.

JIM.

>> IT'S ONE OF THE GREATEST ROCK'N' ROLL SONGS OF ALL TIME, BUT

WAS THE INTRO TO LED ZEPPELIN'S"STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN" STOLEN FROM

THE 1960s BAND SPIRIT?

ACCORDING TO AN ATTORNEY FORSPIRIT'S FORMER LEAD GUITARIST,

THE ZEPPELIN CLASSIC SOUNDSSTRIKINGLY SIMILAR TO SPIRIT'S

SONG "TAURUS."

>> Stephen: LED ZEPPELINIS BEING ACCUSED OF PLAGIARIZING

"STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN" 43 YEARSAFTER IT CAME OUT. THE

PLAINTIFF NEEDED TIME TO LISTENTO IT ALL THE WAY THROUGH.

IF YOU'RE UNFAMILIAR WITH THE'60s ROCK BAND SPIRIT, IT'S

PROBABLY BECAUSE YOU WERE NEVERIN THE '60s ROCK BAND SPIRIT.

BUT THE ESTATE OF THEIR LEADSINGER RANDY CALIFORNIA,

SEEN HERE, LOOKING LIKE THAT,CLAIMS THAT LED ZEPPELIN

RIPPED HIM OFF. YOU DECIDE.

HERE'S LED ZEPPELIN'S "STAIRWAYTO HEAVEN."

♪♪ ♪♪

[LAUGHTER][APPLAUSE]

NOW HERE'S SPIRIT'S SONG"TAURUS."

♪♪I DON'T KNOW WHAT LEGALLY

CONSTITUTES PLAGIARISM, ALL IKNOW IS THAT THEY BOTH MADE ME

WANT TO COUPLE'S SKATE.

[LAUGHTER]SO I HAVE NO CHOICE TO GIVE A

WAG OF MY THINGER TO MY FORMERHEROES, LED ZEPPELIN.

I KNOW SOME OF YOU ARE THINKING,MAYBE IT'S A COINCIDENCE.

AREN'T YOU BEING A LITTLE HARDON ZEP?

WELL GREG, EAT HOT FACT.

>> TAURUS WAS RELEASED IN1968 THREE YEARS BEFORE

"STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN." JIMMYPAIGE SAYS

HE WROTE IT IN A COTTAGE INWALES BACK IN 1970. BUT A LAWYER

REPRESENTING RANDY CALIFORNIA,WHOSE BAND TOURED WITH

LED ZEPPELIN IN 1969, SAYS PAIGESTOLE THE OPENING RIFF.

>> Stephen: AND IF THAT WASN'TENOUGH, PAIGE ALSO APPARENTLY

STOLE THE NECK FROM ONE OFSPIRIT'S GUITARS.

WELL, THIS "COMMUNICATIONBREAKDOWN" HAS LEFT ME "DAZED

AND CONFUSED."

IT'S A REAL "HEARTBREAKER,"BECAUSE I HAD A "WHOLE

LOTTA LOVE" FOR ZEP.

BUT "HEY, HEY, WHAT CANI DO?"

IN HERE, THE "LEVEE HAS BROKEN,""BLACK DOG."

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]NO LONGER...

NO LONGER WILL I CELEBRATESEPTEMBER AS ZEPTEMBER.

I'LL HAVE TO MAKE DO WITHROCTOBER, TULLVEMBER, STONESUARY

AND BARCH.

[LAUGHTER]SO, ZEP, THAT'S IT.

INSTEAD OF LISTENING TO YOU, I'MGOING TO LISTEN TO SPIRIT'S "12

DREAMS OF DOCTOR SARDONICUS."

♪♪ ♪♪

[LAUGHTER]OH YEAH,.

OH, YEAH, I'M EVENTUALLY GOINGTO GET INTO THIS.

JIMMY, CRANK IT UP.

NOW CRANK IT DOWN.

ALL RIGHT.

NOW JUST CRANK IT OFF.

[LAUGHTER]WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

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