Paul Ryan's Phony Campaign Photo

  • Aired:  10/16/12
  •  | Views: 44,389

Paul Ryan ambushes a soup kitchen while Mitt Romney visits the special kitchen in his house that only makes soup. (4:07)

>> STEPHEN: WELCOME BACK

EVERYBODY.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

FOLKS, TONIGHT, OF COURSE IS

WITHOUT ANY DOUBT IN MY HEART

SURE TO BE MITT ROMNEY'S TRIUMPH

BUT LET'S NOT FORGET THE

IMPORTANT CONTRIBUTION MADE BY

HIS YOUTHFUL WARD PAUL RYAN AND

ON SATURDAY RYAN DID IT AGAIN.

>> VICE PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE

PAUL RYAN CAME TO NORTHEAST

OHIO.

HE VISIT AID SOUP CICH MONEY IN

YOUNGSTOWN.

AS THE FAMILY WASHED DISHES AT

THE KITCHEN.

>> STEPHEN: FORGET ATLAS

SHRUGS THIS WEEKEND ATLAS

SCRUBS.

AND HERE IS THE THING, HOW DID

THE CHARITY THANK RYAN?

WITH A STEAMING LADLE OF

COMPLAINTS.

>> THE ROMNEY CAMPAIGN IS ON

DEFENSE OVER THIS PAUL RYAN

PHOTO OP AT A SOUP KITCHEN.

>> THE PRESIDENT OF THE CHARITY

SAID THE CAMPAIGN QUOTE

RAMRODDED THEIR WAY IN SO RYAN

COULD GET HIS PICTURE TAKEN

WHILE WASHING DISHES.

THE PHOTO OP THEY DID WAS NOT

ACCURATE.

HE DID NOTHING.

HE CAME IN HERE TO GET THE

PICTURE TAKEN AT THE DINING

HALL.

>> STEPHEN: YES, ACCORD

TWOAFGHT PAUL RYAN SHOWED UP FOR

15 MINUTES AT A SOUP KITCHEN

AFTER THE PATRONS HAD LEFT AND

WASHED POTS AND PANS THAT DID

NOT APPEAR TO BE DIRTY.

[ LAUGHTER ]

NOW, FOLKS, THAT MAY SOUND

POINTLESS BUT REMEMBER HE'S

RUNNING FOR VICE PRESIDENT.

[ LAUGHTER ]

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IT WASN'T

THE MOST EMBARRASSING PHOTO OF

RYAN WE'VE SEEN LATELY.

RYAN IS FOLLOWING HIS BOSSES

LEAD.

LAST WEEK MITT PAID A VISIT TO

THE SOUP CICH CHINA IS THE

SPECIAL KITCHEN IN HIS HOUSE

THAT MAKES ONLY SOUP.

[ LAUGHTER ]

IT'S RIGHT NEXT -- IT'S RIGHT

NEXT TO THE SALTINE BAKERY SO

THEY ARE FRESH.

[ LAUGHTER ]

THE DINING HALL'S COORDINATOR

PILED ON ADDING IT WAS QUOTE THE

PHONIEST PIECE OF BALONEY I'VE

EVER BEEN ASSOCIATED WITH WHICH

IS SAYING A LOT CONSIDERING THE

QUALITY OF BALONEY THAT IS

GENERALLY SERVED AT SOUP

KITCHENS.

BUT I BELIEVE THERE'S NOTHING TO

SEE HERE, FOLKS.

RYAN'S TOWNHALL RAN A LITTLE

LATE SEW MISSED HOMELESS

BREAKFAST.

WHAT WAS HE SUPPOSED TO DO

CHARITY ON THE NEEDY SCHEDULE?

SOMETIMES THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE.

TAKE ME I'M A BUSY MAN BUT I

LIKE TO BE PHOTOGRAPHED

APPEARING TO HELP OTHERS SO ONCE

A MONTH AFTER THIS SHOW ENDS AT

MIDNIGHT I CHUG A FIVE HOUR

ENERGY AND GO TO THE NURSING

HOME AND BREAK OUT OLD ALTO SAX

AND START WAILING.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

I DON'T WANT TO BRAG BUT I'M

SOMETHING OF A MIRACLE WORKING.

SOME OF THEM JUMP OUT THE BED

FOR THE FIRST TIME IN YEARS.

DON'T FAULT RYAN HERE, FOLKS.

I SAY HE IS THE VICTIMMENT AND I

HAVE I MESSAGE FOR THOSE SO

QUICK TO JUDGE THIS GOOD MAN.

[ LAUGHTER ]

HI I'M STEPHEN COLBERT WITH SAVE

THE CANDIDATES.

THIS IS PAUL.

SOME DAY HE WANTS IT BE VICE

PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.

BUT HE NEEDS YOUR HELP.

FOR JUST A FEW MINUTES A DAY YOU

CAN PROVIDE PAUL WITH THE PHOTO

OPS HE DESPERATELY NEEDS TO LOOK

LIKE HE CARES.

ANYTHING YOU GIVE WILL HELP.

A HANDFUL OF ORPHANS TO STAND

NEAR.

A DISABLED VET TO WAVE AT.

EVEN A HOMELESS MAN TO PET.

WON'T YOU CALL NOW AND HELP THIS

YOUNG MAN LIVE UP TO HIS DREAMS

OF CUTTING ALL YOUR GOVERNMENT

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