Goodbye, Muammar al-Gaddafi

  • Aired:  10/20/11
  •  | Views: 30,880

Rebels pull Muammar al-Gaddafi out of a hole and kill him, ending his brutal 42-year reign. (3:17)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: WELCOME TO THE

REPORT, EVERYBODY.

>> STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

>> Stephen: THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

PLEASE, THANK YOU FOR JOIN

JOINING US.

NATION... NATION, BY NOW YOU'VE

ALL HEARD THE BIG NEWS--

COLDPLAY IS HERE.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

SPEAKING OF COLDS, THERE'S ALSO

BIG NEWS OUT OF LIBYA.

JIMMY?

MAKE THE TV SPEAK.

>> A U.S. GOVERNMENT OFFICIAL

NOW SAYS THAT LIBYA'S LEADERS

HAVE INFORMED US THAT QADDAFI IS

INDEED DEAD.

HE'S DEAD, OKAY, GOT IT.

IT'S OFFICIAL, THAT'S FROM A

U.S. OFFICIAL, HE IS DEAD,

MUERTE, GONE.

>> Stephen: YES, QADDAFI IS

DEAD, MUERTE, MUERTO, ADIOS,

SAYONARA, ALOHA.

THE GOOD-BYE ONE.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Stephen: THIS MORNING, REBELS

SEIZED CONTROL OF THE QADDAFI

STRONGHOLD OF SIRTE WHERE THEY

CAPTURED AND KILLED QADDAFI,

ENDING HIS BRUTAL 42 YEAR REIGN.

NOW IN HINDSIGHT IT MAY HAVE

BEEN A MISTAKE FOR HIM TO HIRE

BODYGUARDS BASED ON THEIR

HOTNESS.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Stephen: NOW FOLKS, I CAN

UNDERSTAND WHY EVERYBODY IS

CELEBRATING.

BUT PERSONALLY, I HAVE MIXED

FEELINGS.

MOAMMAR WAS A FRIEND OF THE

SHOW.

THE GUY WAS ONE OF A KIND-- PART

MADMAN, PART FASHION ICON, PART

COMIC GENIUS.

HE MADE US LAUGH.

HE MADE US CRY.

ABOUT THE THINGS THAT MADE HIM

LAUGH.

(LAUGHTER)

LIKE LOSING EAVES St-LAURENT,

GEORGE BURNS AND POL POT ALL ON

THE SAME DAY.

GEORGE BURNS, OF COURSE, A

HOMICIDAL MANIAC.

NOW, QADDAFI'S DEATH WAS

DIFFICULT TO CONFIRM SINCE EVERY

LIVING PICTURE OF HIM COULD BE

CONFUSED FOR A DEATH PHOTO.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT HERE'S HOW IT WENT DOWN.

>> LIBYAN OFFICIALS ARE SAYING

THAT QADDAFI WAS HIDING IN SOME

SORT OF HOLE OR TUNNEL NETWORK,

THAT HE WAS PULLED FROM THIS

HOLE/TUNNEL NETWORK ALIVE, AND

THAT HE WAS KILLED BY THE

REBELS.

>> Stephen: NOW IF YOU RECALL,

THEY PULLED SADDAM OUT OF A

HOLE.

EVIDENTLY, TOTALITARIAN

DICTATORS ARE A NOCTURNAL

BURROWING SPECIES.

OF COURSE, WHO CAN FORGET ABOUT

THE TIME JACK HANNA BROUGHT KIM

JONG IL ON LENO?

NATION, I SAY WE NEED TO STAY

VIGILANT HERE.

QADDAFI WAS A G, MAYBE GONE, BUT

WE STILL HAVE NOT CAPTURED

QUADDAFI, GASTAFI AND HANNUKAH.

FOLKS, I AM ESPECIALLY...

(APPLAUSE)

FOLKS, I AM ESPECIALLY EXCITED

THIS WAR IS OVER BECAUSE IT

MEANS WE GET TO PICK THE NEXT

WAR!

( LAUGHTER )

I WONDER WHO IT'S GOING TO BE.

IF WE FOLLOW OUR STANDARD WAR

PREDICTOR, IT'S WHOEVER WE WERE

PROPPING UP TEN YEARS AGO.

SO ST

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