Anthony Weiner's Emergency Press Conference

  • Aired:  06/06/11
  •  | Views: 79,098

Anthony Weiner's sadly delicious, sordid saga proves that Democrats don't share Republican values. (5:43)

( APPLAUSE )

>> Stephen: YEAH, YEAH, OH,

YEAH, THIS IS GOOD STUFF.

WELCOME TO THE REPORT.

THANK YOU SO MUCH, EVERYBODY.

>> STEPHEN, STEPHEN,

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

>> Stephen: THANK YOU,

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

GOOD TO HAVE YOU WITH US.

NATION, THIS IS ONE OF THOSE

RARE DAYS THAT MAKE ME PROUD

TO BE A NEWSMAN.

TO REPORT HISTORY AS IT

HAPPENS.

BECAUSE I THINK WE WILL ALL

REMEMBER WHERE WE WERE WHEN

WE FOUND OUT THAT THIS IS,

IN FACT, ANTHONY WEINER'S

[BLEEP].

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: I KNOW, IT'S

SHOCKING.

HE'S SO THIN.

NAKED HE MUST LOOK LIKE A

WINDSOCK HANGING OFF A

PARKING METER.

NOW HE SAID THIS WASN'T HIM.

BUT TODAY AT AN EMERGENCY

PRESS CONFERENCE THE TRUTH

CAME OUT, LIKE A--

(LAUGHTER)

LIKE A DOLPHIN WIGGLING FREE

OF A BLANKET.

JIM.

>> LAST FRIDAY NIGHT I

TWEETED A PHOTOGRAPH OF

MYSELF THAT I INTENDED TO

SEND AS A DIRECT MESSAGE AS

PART OF A JOKE TO A WOMAN IN

SEATTLE.

ONCE I REALIZED I HAD POSTED

IT TO TWITTER I PANICKED,

TOOK IT DOWN AN SAID THAT I

HAD BEEN HACKED.

>> Stephen: HE LIED!

FOR TEN DAYS.

AND ONLY CAME CLEAN TODAY

WHEN ADDITIONAL PHOTOS LIKE

THIS WERE RELEASED.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Stephen: I MEAN THAT IS

ACTUALLY UNDERSTANDABLE.

THE GUY'S MY AGE AND HE'S

TOTALLY CUT.

IT WOULD BE HARD NOT TO

TWEET A PHOTO LIKE THAT.

THAT IS WHY I HAVE MADE THE

MORAL CHOICE TO LET MYSELF

GO.

(LAUGHTER)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: I GOT TO TELL

YOU, I AM IN NO WAY TEMPTED

TO SHARE THIS WITH ANYBODY.

PROUD TO SAY I HAVE THE

TORSO OF A 76-YEAR-OLD MAN.

AND FOLKS, IT TURNS OUT

THESE AREN'T EVEN THE ONLY

PHOTOS.

>> TO BE CLEAR THE PICTURE

WAS OF ME AND I SENT IT.

IN ADDITION, OVER THE PAST

FEW YEARS I HAVE ENGAGED IN

SEVERAL INAPPROPRIATE

CONVERSATIONS CONDUCTED OVER

TWITTER, FACEBOOK, E-MAIL

AND OCCASIONALLY ON THE

PHONE.

>> Stephen: NOT TO MENTION

MORSE CODE, PNEUMATIC TUBE

AND SEMAPHORE.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT TECHNICALLY, HE WAS NOT

HOLDING A FLAG.

BUT WEINER DID MAKE ONE

THING CLEAR, JIM?

>> TO BE CLEAR, I HAVE NEVER

MET ANY OF THESE WOMEN OR

HAD PHYSICAL RELATIONSHIPS

AT ANY TIME.

>> Stephen: NO PHYSICAL

RELATIONSHIPS WITH THE

WOMEN.

BUT I THINK WE CAN SAY WITH

CONFIDENCE THAT THOSE TWEETS

ENTERED WITH A NOTHINGING OF

THE FAIL WHALE.

IT WAS AFTER THIS HUMILIATING

PUBLIC CONFESSION THAT

REPRESENTATIVE WEINER SAID

THE MOST SHOCKING THING OF

ALL.

>> I WILL TAKE ANY QUESTIONS

THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE.

>> Stephen: WHAT?

(LAUGHTER)

OKAY, I HAVE ONE.

WHY ARE YOU TAKING

QUESTIONS?

(LAUGHTER)

AND I HAVE A FOLLOWUP, ARE

YOU READY TO APOLOGISE TO

ANDREW BREITBART.

>> APOLOGIZED TO ANDREW

BREITBART.

>> Stephen: WOW THAT WAS

FAST.

AND WELL, YOU SHOULD

CONGRESSMAN, BREITBART HAS

TAKEN FLACK FOR USING

MISLEADING EDITING IN THE

ACORN PIMP SCANDAL, THE

SHIRLEY SHERROD SCANDAL AND

THE NPR SCANDAL, BUT AFTER

THIS HE IS ONE FOR FOUR.

(LAUGHTER)

AND ALWAYS--

(APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: AND AS ALWAYS,

BREITBART WAS GRACIOUS IN

VICTORY.

>> IT IS NEWS, MY FRIEND, IT

IS-- IT IS NEWS.

I'M HERE FOR SOME

VINDICATION.

>> Stephen: YOU GOT IT,

ANDY.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Stephen: I THINK IT IS

TIME TO ADMIT NOT ONLY IS

THIS A VALUABLE MEMBER OF

THE PRESS, I WOULD GO SO FAR

AS TO SAY THIS IS THE EDWARD

R. MURROW OF CONGRESSIONAL

WANG PHOTOS.

AND I TELL YOU, FOLKS, THIS

WHOLE SORDID, SAD DELICIOUS

AND SADLY DELICIOUS SORDID

SAGA JUST REINFORCES WHAT

I'VE ALWAYS SAID.

DEMOCRATS DON'T SHARE OUR

VALUES.

AN ELECTED OFFICIAL IS

TWEETING DIRTY PHOTOS OF

HIMSELF TO STRANGE WOMEN WHO

HE NEVER MEETS FOR SEX?

(LAUGHTER)

COME ON!

AT LEAST REPUBLICANS CHRIS

LEE WAS TRYING TO GET SOME

ACTION.

(LAUGHTER)

REPUBLICAN POLITICIANS

POLITICIANS-- REPUBLICAN

POLITICIANS ARE MAN ENOUGH

TO HIT THAT THING.

ENSIGN, VITTER, EVEN WHEN

IT'S A GAY SCANDAL, THEY'RE

NOT TWEETING LOVE LETTERS,

THEY'RE TEARING UP AN

AIRPORT PASSENGER UNTIL

SOMEBODY CALLS THE COPS ON

THEM.

I MEAN--

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: I MEAN CALL ME

OLD-FASHIONED.

BUT I LONG FOR SIMPLER TIMES

AND COMMON SENSE, VALUES.

I WANT TO LEAVE OUR

GRANDCHILDREN AND AMERICA

WHERE CONGRESSMAN BANG THEIR

SECRETARIESES.

SORRY, SORRY I

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