Michele Bachmann's Last Term

  • Aired:  06/04/13
  •  | Views: 121,545

Michele Bachmann announces her retirement in a web video recorded at the Sears portrait studio. (4:09)

>> --

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

HEY, HOW ABOUT THAT.

>> STEPHEN, STEPHEN,

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

>> Stephen: WELCOME TO THE

REPORT.

EVERYBODY.

THANK YOU FOR JOINING US.

I I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS

MEANS.

PLEASE, NATION, I APPRECIATE

THE WELCOME.

PLEASE SIT DOWN.

WE HAVE SO MUCH TO TALK

ABOUT.

LOOK, I REALLY APPRECIATE

ALL THE SUPPORT YOU'RE

GIVING ME TONIGHT BECAUSE I

COME TO YOU WITH A HEAVY

HEART.

AND NOT JUST BECAUSE MY

PRESHOW COCKTAILS OF BOURBON

AND NUTELLA.

NO, FOLKS, I AM ENSADDENED

BY THE RECENT ANNOUNCED

RETIREMENT OF AN

CONSERVATIVE GIANT MICHELE

BACHMANN.

(LAUGHTER)

YES, TRUE.

THE CONGRESSWOMAN WHO

REPRESENTS MINNESOTA'S

VALLEY OF THE DOLLS.

SHE BROKE THE NEWS IN A WEB

VIDEO RECORDED AT, I BELIEVE,

THE SEARS PORTRAIT STUDIO.

(LAUGHTER)

>> JIM?

>> AFTER A GREAT DEAL OF

THOUGHT AND DELIBERATION I

HAVE DECIDED NEXT YEAR I

WILL NOT SEEK A FIFTH

CONGRESSIONAL TERM.

>> THERE YOU HAVE IT, NO

FIFTH TERM.

A POLITICAL CAREER OVER IN

THE BLINK OF AN EYE.

WHICH FOR MICHELE BACHMANN

IS ONCE EVERY EIGHT YEARS.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT FOLKS, DONE WORRY.

IN HER REMAINING TIME IN

OFFICE MICHELLE BACHMANN

WILL STAY FOCUSED ON HER

GOALS.

>> I WILL CONTINUE TO WORK

VEHEMENTLY AND ROBUSTLY TO

FIGHT BACK AGAINST WHAT MOST

IN THE OTHER PARTY WANT TO

DO TO TRANSFORM OUR COUNTRY

INTO BECOMING.

>> YES.

WE MUST FIGHT THOSE MOST

BEFORE OUR COUNTRY IS

TRANSFORMED INTO BECOMING.

STUPID MOST.

SO TONIGHT, FOLKS, WE SAY

GOOD-BYE TO MICHELE BACHMANN

AND LOOK FONDLY BACK AT SOME

OF HER VERY MOMENTS.

(LAUGHTER)

>> PLANNED PARENTHOOD IS A

BILLION DOLLAR A YEAR

ENTITY.

THEY WANT TO BECOME THE

LENSCRAFTER OF BIG ABORTION.

>> IT'S A VERY SAD LIFE.

IT'S PART OF SATAN I THINK

TO SAY THIS IS GAY.

IT'S ANYTHING BUT GAY.

>> LEADS TO THE PERSONAL

ENSLAVEMENT OF INDIVIDUALS.

BECAUSE IF YOU ARE'S

INVOLVED IN THE GAY AND

LESBIAN LIFESTYLE, IT'S

BONDAGE.

>> THE VERY FOUNDERS THAT

WROTE THOSE DOCUMENTS WORKED

TIRELESSLY UNTIL SLAVERY WAS

NO MORE IN THE UNITED

STATES.

>> THERE'S A WOMAN WHO CAME

UP CRYING TO ME TONIGHT

AFTER THE DEBATE.

SHE SAID HER DAUGHTER WAS

GIVEN THAT VACCINE.

SHE TOLD ME HER DAUGHTER

SUFFERED MENTAL RETARDATION

AS A RESULT OF THAT VACCINE.

>> THERE ISN'T EVEN ONE

STUDY THAT CAN BE PRODUCED

THAT SHOWS THAT CARBON

DIOXIDE IS A HARMFUL GAS.

>> OUR FATHERS THOUGHT

TAXATION WITHOUT

REPRESENTATION WAS BAD WA,

WOULD THEY THINK OF

REPRESENTATION WITH TAXATION.

>> I GOT TWO CUPCAKES FOR

YOU.

DID YOU GET THEM.

YOU WE GOT TWO CUP TAKES FOR

YOU, DID YOU GET THEM.

WE DIDN'T KNOW IF YOU LIKED

CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA.

(APPLAUSE)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: I WILL MISS HER.

THAT'S WHY I SENT HER TWO

FAREWELL CUP TAKES.

WE SENT HER TOO, DID SHE GET

THEM DID.

SHE GET THE TWO?

WHAT?

WHAT'S--

(LAUGHTER)