Stephen Searches for Shared Bathroom Key

  • Aired:  05/04/11
  •  | Views: 100,025

Stephen urges viewers to donate to the Red Cross while he searches for the shared bathroom key under David Letterman's desk. (4:05)

[LAUGHTER]

THE ONLY PROBLEM WITH THIS STORY

IS FOR DAYS WE'VE BEEN OBSESSED

WITH INTERNATIONAL NEWS.

IT'S JUST BEEN BIN LADEN, BIN

LADEN, THIS STUPID HAT, BIN

LADEN.

WE'VE IGNORED IMPORTANT STORIES

AT HOME.

FOR INSTANCE,, THE AMERICAN

HEARTLAND HAS BEEN DEVASTATED BY

WEATHER.

MISSISSIPPI AND ALABAMA WERE

SLAMMED BY HUGE TORNADOES,

BILLIONS OF DOLLARS OF DAMAGE,

HUNDREDS OF LIVES LOST.

OUR HEART, OF COURSE, GOES OUT

TO EVERYONE AFFECTED.

I URGE ALL MY VIEWERS TO TEXT

RED CROSS TO 90999 TO DONATE $10

INSTANTLY OR GO TO REDCROSS.ORG

AND GIVE GENEROUSLY.

THEY NEED IT.

THE HEARTLAND IS NOT OUT OF THE

WOODS.

STORMS HAVE SWOLLEN THE

MISSISSIPPI WHICH IS ALREADY

SWOAL WITHIN S'S, I'S AND P'S.

THE LEVEES ARE FULL AND READY TO

BURST.

WATER HAS BEEN SPLASHING OVER IN

A STEADY TRICKLE.

IN SOME PLACES THE CORPS OF

ENGINEERS HAD NO CHOICE BUT TO

BLOW A HOLE AND LET HER RIP.

WATER IS GUSHING IN A ROARING

STREAM.

I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM

NOW.

THIS IS SO UNPROFESSIONAL.

I SHUFT DEALT WITH THIS.

I JUST HAVE TO HIT THE BATH ROOJ

FOR A SECOND.

[LAUGHTER]

AND IT'S LOCKED.

OKAY.

DAM, WHO HAS GOT THE BATHROOM

KEY.

JIMMY, WHERE IS THE KEY?

>> I DON'T KNOW.

>> Stephen: I KNOW WHERE IT

IS.

HE NEVER PUTS IT BACK.

I HAVE TO GO GET THE KEY.

THIS WOULD BE A GREAT TIME FOR

TO YOU TEXT RED CROSS TO 90999

OR GO TO REDCROSS.ORG.

I'LL BE BACK IN A MINUTE.

JIMMY IT'S 11:40.

YOU JUST WATCH LETTERMAN OR

SOMETHING.

OKAY?

>> HERE LET'S TAKE A LOOK.

OH, NO.

DAMMIT NO, NO, THAT'S JETER'S

PLACE.

WHY DO WE -- EVERY NIGHT!

WHY CAN'T WE GET THE --

[LAUGHTER]

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

>> HEY, EXCUSE ME, STEPHEN HOW

ARE YOU DOING, BUDDY.

>> Stephen: YEAH, YOU TOO,

DEAF.

>> Dave: WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE

OF A DEAL CAN I HELP YOU?

>> Stephen: I HAVE TO GO TO

THE BATHROOM.

DO YOU KNOW WHERE THE KEY IS.

>> Dave: I DON'T REALLY

OFFHAND.

IF -- STAOEFRPBLT DON'T MIND ME

I'LL BE DONE IN A JIFFY.

I GOT IT.

OUT OF MY WAY.

I HAVE TO PEE!

[ APPLAUSE ]

GOT IT.

I GOT IT.

I GOT IT.

SORRY, FOLKS.

THIS NETWORK AND CBS ARE OWNED

BY THE SAME COMPANY, VIACOM AND

WE HAVE TO SHARE THE SAME

BATHROOM.

IT'S REALLY TOUGH ON CRAIG

FERGUSON.

HE HAS TO FLY IN FROM L.A.

I'LL GET THIS DONE.

BE BACK IN TWO SHAKES.

OKAY.

THERE WE GO.

OH, GOSH, I'M SO SORRY.

>> HEY -- OCCUPIED.

>> Stephen: I DIDN'T KNOW YOU

WERE IN HERE.

>> NOW YOU DO.

>> Stephen: IS THERE ANY

CHANCE I COULD JUST --

>> I AM IN HERE.

>> Stephen: I UNDERSTAND.

I UNDERSTAND.

>> GEEZ.

>> Stephen: I'LL JUST HOLD IT.

I'LL GET THIS BACK TO DAVE.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

>> HOW BAD COULD IT BE?

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

>> Stephen: SORRY ABOUT THAT.

THANKS, DAVE.

>> GOOD TO SEE YOU.

>> Stephen: KEEP THOSE LAUGHS

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