Egypt's Stork Bust

  • Aired:  09/09/13
  •  | Views: 37,983

With tensions running high in Egypt, everyone suspects everyone else of espionage, including birds. (2:53)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Stephen: WELCOME TO THE

"REPORT," GOOD TO HAVE YOU WITHUS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!

(AUDIENCE CHANTING"STEPHEN").

THANK YOU, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!

IN HERE; OUT THERE; AROUND THEWORLD, WELCOME TO THE "REPORT,"

EVERYBODY.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)NATION, I'M SURE I'M NOT THE

ONLY ONE WHO THINKS THIS, BUT IAM WORRIED ABOUT EGYPT.

THOSE GUYS HAVE GOT THEIR HEADSUP THEIR SPANX.

(LAUGHTER)FIRST MUBARAK WAS IN, THEN

MUBARAK WAS OUT.

AND MORSI WAS IN, NOW MORSI ISOUT AND INSTEAD ARMY GENERAL AND

GEORGE LOPEZ OF THE DESERT ABDELFATTAH AL-SISI IS IN.

AND WITH TENSIONS RUNNING HIGH,FOLKS, EVERYONE IS SUSPECTING

EVERYONE ELSE OVER THERE AND IDON'T BLAME THEM BECAUSE THEY

ALL LOOK KIND OF MIDDLE EASTERN.

(LAUGHTER)BUT THANKFULLY THERE'S BEEN AN

IMPROVEMENT IN EGYPT'S SECURITYSITUATION.

FOR MORE WE TURN KTRT, HOUSTON'SEGYPT NEWS LEADER.

>> IN EGYPT, A STORK WAS BUSTEDAS A SUSPECTED SPY.

A CITIZEN THOUGHT THE BIRD WASAN UNDERCOVER AGENT BECAUSE IT

CARRIED A SUSPICIOUS ELECTRONICDEVICE.

>> Stephen: "SUSPICIOUSELECTRONIC DEVICE."

COULD IT HAVE BEEN THE NEWIPHONE 5S?

(LAUGHTER)AND I SAY THAT SIMPLY BECAUSE I

WANT A FREE ONE.

(LAUGHTER)NOW, DON'T BELIEVE THIS STORK IS

A SPY?

SOME SOURCES HAVE REPORTED THATTHIS AGENT WAS INSTEAD A SWAN!

WHICH MEANS THIS STORK HAS ASECRET IDENTITY, A NOM DE

PLUMAGE.

(LAUGHTER)AND THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME

THE ANIMAL KINGDOM HAS GOTCAUGHT UP IN MIDDLE EASTERN

ESPIONAGE.

AS I REPORTED PREVIOUSLY, EGYPTACCUSED ISRAELI AGENTS OF BEING

BEHIND A LOCAL SHARK ATTACK AND--

(LAUGHTER).

SAUDI ARABIA ARRESTED A VULTUREON SUSPICION OF SPYING FOR

ISRAEL.

(LAUGHTER)AND THEY ALSO ARRESTED A RABBIT

FOR BEING ONE LETTER AWAY FROM ARABBI.

(LAUGHTER)(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

WELL, WHETHER HE TURNS OUT TO BEA SPY OR NOT, I CERTAINLY HOPE

EGYPTIAN OFFICIALS INTERROGATETHIS STORK UNTIL IT REVEALS

WHERE BABIES REALLY COME FROM.

(LAUGHTER)VAGINAS, INDEED!

(LAUGHTER)MAKES NO SENSE.

WE'LL HAVE MORE ON THIS STORY

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