cOlbert's Book Club - J.D. Salinger

  • Aired:  09/10/13
  •  | Views: 38,888

America chooses not to attack Syria, and Stephen gets ready to discuss the biggest initials in 20th century literature. (3:57)

( THEME SONG PLAYING )>> STEPHEN COLBERT PRESENTS, THE

C-OLBERT BOOK CLUB, TONIGHT'SSELECTION.

>> EVERYTHING, THE CATCHER INTHE RYE, BY J.D. SALINGER.

>> EVERYTHING, THE CATCHER INTHE RYE, BY J.D. SALINGER.

>> EVERYTHING, THE CATCHER INTHE RYE, BY J.D. SALINGER.

STEPHEN! STEPHEN!

>> Stephen: WELCOME TOEVERYBODY.

THANK YOU FOR JOINING US, IN THESTUDIO AND ALL AROUND THE WORLD.

>> YOU ARE JOINING US FOR ANHISTORIC EVENING. THIS IS THE

SECOND EDITION OF THE C-OLBERTBOOK CLUB.

TONIGHT, WE ARE STEPPING AWAYFROM THE CONFLICT IN SYRIA,

BECAUSE APPARENTLY THAT WAS THEUNITED STATES.

A LOT OF DETAILS STILL TO BEWORKED OUT AND WE WILL GET INTO

THOSE TOMORROW, BUT THE UPSHOTIS THAT AMERICA WILL NOT ATTACK

SYRIA FOR GASSING ITS CITIZENSIF THEY GIVE UP THEIR CHEMICALS

WEAPONS.

>> IT IS LIKE IF YOU DECAPITATEADD CO-WORKER, SO THEY ARE

TAKING AWAY YOUR AX.

BUT YOU GET TO KEEP YOUR JOB ANDYOUR HATCHETT.

>> BE GOOD NOW! BE GOOD! OKAY.

ANYWAY, FORGET THAT STUFF.

IT IS A DOWNER.

LET'S GET TO THE BOOK CLUB.

ALREADY IN PROGRESS.

>> NOW, AS YOU KNOW, I AM APOWERFUL MEDIA MOGUL.

I HAVE GOT MY OWN SHOW, I HAVEGOT MY BEST SELLING BOOK.

I HAVE GOT AN AWARD WINNINGTWITTER FEED! AND, OF COURSE, I

HAVE MY MASSIVE DAILY E-MAILBLAST OF THE INTERNET BEST

FORWARDS.

RITICS HAVE RAVED, UNSUBSCRIBE! BUT I DON'T HAVE MY OWN NETWORK

LIKE THE OWN NETWORK, WHICH ISOWNED BY OWN-PRAH WINFREY.

>> BUT NOW I DO HAVE THIS BOOKCLUB, WHICH IS WHY I HAVE BEEN

CHUGGING CHARDONNAY SINCE NOON.

.. AND PITCHING ABOUT MYSISTER-IN-LAW SHARON AND THE WAY

SHE FEEDS MY KIDS WHEN THEY AREOVER AT HER PLACE.

DON'T TELL ME THEY HAD DINNER IFALL YOU GAVE THEM BUT A GOGURT

AND A CLIFF BAR, YOU BITCH!

[ APPLAUSE ]>> SPEAKING OF DRINKING HEAVILY,

F. SCOTT FITZGERALD.

THAT IS THE AUTHOR WE TALKEDABOUT LAST TIME.

TONIGHT, WE WILL BE TALKINGABOUT THE BIGGEST INITIALS IN

20TH CENTURY LITERATURE, J.D.

SALINGER.

A MAN SO RECLUSIVE HIS FIRST TWONAMES ARE STILL A SECRET.

WAS IT JOE DON? JUAN DIEGO?

>> JOE DA PLUMBER?

>> UNFORTUNATELY SALINGER CANNOTBE WITH US TONIGHT, EITHER MTV

BOOKED HIM TO APPEAR ON THEVMA'S, OR --

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>> Stephen: -- OR HE DIED IN

2010.

ONLY TIME WILL TELL.

BUT WE HAVE GOT A FANTASTIC SHOWLATER ON WE WILL BE TALKING

ABOUT SALINGER'S LITERARYINFLUENCE WITH TOBIAS WOLFF,

AUTHOR OF "THIS BOY'S LIFE" ANDWE WILL BE DISCUSSING THE NEW

DOCUMENTARY ABOUT SALINGER WITHITS DIRECTOR SHANE SALERNO, WHO

ALSO COWROTE THE 1998BLOCKBUSTER, "ARMAGEDDON".

WHICH IS WHY AT THE END OF THEDOCUMENTARY, SALINGER BLOWS

HIMSELF UP TO SAVE BEN AFFLECK.

TRUE STORY.

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