StePhest Colbchella '011 - Rock You Like a Thirst-Icane

  • Aired:  06/20/11
  •  | Views: 26,798

Dr Pepper and Stephen are so excited to have a week of great bands, including Bon Iver, Florence and the Machine, Talib Kweli, and Jack White. (4:47)

( APPLAUSE ) WELCOME TO THE REPORT,

EVERYBODY.

GOOD TO HAVE YOU WITH US.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

WHOOO!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) WOW, THANK YOU.

YOU KNOW, IT'S HARD TO TELL YOU ABOUT IT ALMOST SOUNDS LIKE YOU FOLKS WANT ME TO DO

AN ENCORE AND I HAVEN'T EVEN PLAYED YET.

FOLKS, WHAT A GORGEOUS DAY IN MANHATTAN.

SUNSHINE, WARM BREEZES IT JUST REMINDED ME HOW MUCH I DON'T TRUST SUMMER.

(LAUGHTER) WHY IS IT BEING SO NICE.

WHAT'S IT UP TO.

BESIDES, SUMMER HAS A WELL-KNOWN LIBERAL BIAS.

IT GETS HOT OUT SO EVERYBODY STARTS BELIEVING IN GLOBAL WARMING.

AND OUR MOLES GO TO HELL.

THE YOUNG PEOPLE USE THE HEAT TO STRUT AROUND IN REVEALING SUMMER CLOTHES.

I MEAN SEAR SUCKER, LEAVE SOMETHING TO THE IMAGINATION.

WORST OF ALL, FOLKSING SUMMER MEANS HALF NAKED PATCHOULI SOAKED QUITE GUY DREAD LOCK FESTIVALS LIKE

LAL PALOOZA, BONNAROO,

COACHELLA, SALMONELLA.

THERE ARE NEVER ENOUGH PORT A POTTIES AT SALMONELLAFEST.

WELL, ALL THIS WEEK I'M FIGHTING BACK AT MY OWN SUMMER CONCERT VEERS.

NOW OBVIOUSLY THIS IS THE FIRST TIME WE'VE DONE THIS ON THE SHOW.

SO I NEED TO GET THE KIND OF STREET CRED THE ESTABLISHED CONCERTS HAVE.

I HAD CANS WON'T SHOW UP UNLESS IT'S GRITTY, UNLESS IT'S REAL, UNLESS IT HAS AUTHENTICITY.

AND THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO GET THAT.

KORPT SPONSORSHIP.

WHOOO!

(APPLAUSE) WAKE UP THE CROSS PLATFORM MARKET PENETRATION.

LOOK AT THE SICK LINE-UP AT BONNAROO THIS YEAR.

STATE FARM, FORD, MILLER LITE, WHEAT THINS.

THAT'S RIGHT, THEY GOT THE THINS.

THAT'S WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT,

BABY.

IT'S ALL ABOUT DRIVING YOUR WELL INSURED MINIVAN TO HAVE A DIET LAGGER WITH A TASTY

SNACK THAT'S ALSO A GOOD SOURCE OF FIBER.

ROCK 'N' ROLL.

NOW THAT DOESN'T EVEN COUNT BONNAROO'S HEADLINER, GARNIER FRUCTIS.

KNOWN BUT THE GFRUC CAN CRANK UP THE LONG-LASTING VOLUME EVEN FOR FINE HAIR.

THAT'S WHY I'M PROUD TO SAY I HAVE STAKED MY PLACE IN ROCK 'N' ROLL CONCERT HISTORY.

AND SOLD THAT PLACE TO THE HIGHEST BIDDER.

THIS WEEK IT'S NOT JUST "THE COLBERT REPORT" SUMMER

CONCERT SERIES, IT'S-- DR. PEP ERR PRESENTS.

COACHELLA O 121-- 11.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> ROCK IT LIKE.

(APPLAUSE)

>> YES, DR PEPPER THE ONLY DOCTOR YOU'LL EVER NEED WHICH IS GOOD BECAUSE WE

HAVE NOT SET UP FIRST AID TENTS.

SO IF YOU GET A CUT OR SOMETHING JUST POUR SOME DR PEPPER ON IT.

ONE OF THESE INGREDIENTS HAS GOT TO BE NEOSPORINE.

THE DOCTOR AND I ARE SO EXCITED TO HAVE A WEEK OF GREAT BANDS STARTING WITH BON IVER.

TOMORROW-- OH, YEAH.

TOMORROW, FLORENCE AND THE MACHINE.

ON WEDNESDAY TALIW KWEL AND I'M MORE EXCITED TO SEE HIP STERS ON PITCHFORK CITE THIS

MORNING AS THE ONE EACH OF THEM SOLD OUT.

AND ALL WEEK LONG I'LL ON AN A MUSICAL JOURNEY WITH JACK WHITE WHO IS PAIL ENOUGH TO

BE A HEADLINER AT SALMONELLA SALMONELLAFEST.

JACK WILL BE HERE LIVE ON THURSDAY ALONG WITH MUSICAL GUESTS THE BLACK BELLS.

AND WHO KNOWS, MAYBE I'LL JUMP IN THERE TOO.

SO THAT, WHO KNOWS, I WILL.

SO THAT'S THE WEEK.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, ARE YOU READY TO ROCK?

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) I CAN'T HEAR YOU.

ARE YOU READY TO ROCK?

ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT