CataCoffin CataCombo Sound System

  • Aired:  01/15/13
  •  | Views: 17,497

The CataCoffin is the ultimate underground club, equipped with two-way speakers, tweeters and an eight-inch subwoofer. (3:28)

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

FOLKS, WHAT FRIGHTENS ME MOST ABOUT THE HUNGERING DARKNESS OF DEATH IS THAT WHEN I'M LOWERED

INTO THAT COLD GRAVE, I WON'T HAVE ALL MY COOL STUFF.

LUCKILY, ONE COMPANY HAS FOUND A WAY TO FIX THAT.

♪ ♪

>> DO YOU BELIEVE IN MUSIC?

THAT A BEAUTIFUL MELODY CAN REACH BEYOND OUR SENSES?

INTRODUCING THE CATACOMBO SOUND SYSTEM, A REVOLUTIONARY CUSTOMIZED SOUND SYSTEM FOR

AUDIOPHILES ON THE OTHER SIDE.

THE CATACOFFIN EMPLOYS A PAIR OF TWO-WAY SPEAKERS, TWEETERS, AND A DIVINE 8-INCH SUB-WOOFER,

FINE-TUNED TO THE COFFIN'S UNIQUE INTERIOR ACOUSTIC SPACE.

SO, EMBRACE.

EMBRACE YOUR PASSION FOR MUSIC IN THIS LIFE AND THE NEXT.

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Stephen: YES, SPEAKERS MOUNTED INSIDE A COFFIN.

ALSO THE REJECTED SALES PITCH FOR THE FIRST MAZDA MIATA.

[ LAUGHTER ]

I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I'VE ALWAYS HAD A FEAR OF BEING BURIED ALIVE.

BUT I'LL REST EASY KNOWING I MAY SLOWLY SUFFOCATE BUT IT'S TO THE CAREFREE SOUND OF BOBBY

MCFERRIN'S "DON'T WORRY, BE HAPPY." SADLY, FOLKS, WE TOO OFTEN LOSE TOUCH WITH FRIENDS AND LOVED

ONES WHEN WE'RE DEAD.

BUT CATACOMBO LETS THOSE YOU LEFT BEHIND STAY CONNECTED.

♪ ♪

>> THE CATATOMB MUSIC SERVER FEATURES A 7-INCH DISPLAY SHOWING WHAT SONG'S PLAYING SIX

FEET UNDER.

MANAGE YOUR PERSONAL PLAYLIST AND ALLOW FRIENDS AND FAMILY TO SPARE YOU A THOUGHT BY ADDING A SONG.

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Stephen: YES, EVEN AFTER YOU'VE GONE TO THE ULTIMATE UNDERGROUND CLUB, THOSE WHO LOVE

YOU CAN PLAY YOU YOUR FAVORITE BEATLES TUNE OR BRAHMS CONCERTO.

OR, IF THEY HATE YOU, NICKELBACK.

[ LAUGHTER ]

FOLKS, DEAD PEOPLE REPRESENT A VAST, UNTAPPED, RAPIDLY DECOMPOSING MARKET.

CATACOMBO IS PERFECT IF YOU WANT TO BE BURIED WITH YOUR MUSIC COLLECTION, BUT WHAT IF YOU WANT

TO BE CREMATED? INTRODUCING THE iURN.

WHEN YOU'RE READY TO ROCK YOUR ASH OFF!

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND WITH GOOD TUNES, YOU'LL NEED REFRESHMENT.

ANHEUSER BUSCH, START SELLING BUD LIGHT LIME EMBALMING FLUID.

PLEASE DIE RESPONSIBLY.

[ LAUGHTER ]

BUT WHAT IF YOU GET LUCKY?

MUSIC, BEERS, A CUSHY PLACE TO LIE DOWN?

THAT CUTE CADAVER IN THE NEXT PLOT HAS BEEN MAKING EYESOCKETS AT YOU ALL NIGHT.

[ LAUGHTER ]

SO DON'T BE CAUGHT DEAD WITHOUT A PACK OF CATA-CONDOMS.

BECAUSE LET'S FACE IT, YOU'RE DEAD, NOT MARRIED.

[ LAUGHTER ]

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

AND SHE -- SHE IS GOING TO JUMP YOUR BONES.

[ LAUGHTER ]