Colbert Super PAC - Pushing the Limits

  • Aired:  07/11/11
  •  | Views: 21,423

The Colbert Super PAC and “Transformers” have a lot in common: both can rake in millions of dollars for no reason. (3:17)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> STEPHEN, STEPHEN,

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

>> Stephen: WOW!

>> STEPHEN, STEPHEN,

STEPHEN!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: WELCOME TO THE

REPORT, EVERYBODY!

GOOD TO HAVE YOU WITH US.

I GOT TO TELL YOU, THAT

CHANT -- THAT CHANT WAS SO

GOOD, THAT IF I DID NOT KNOW

BETTER I WOULD HAVE THOUGHT

YOU JUST PRACTICED THAT.

(LAUGHTER)

NATION, I HOPE YOU HAD A

GREAT FOURTH OF JULY.

I DID.

I BLOWED UP [BLEEP] REAL

GOOD.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

I CELEBRATED WITH MY ANNUAL

FIREWORKS SHOW.

I LIKE TO MAKE IT BIG ENOUGH

TO BE SEEN FROM ENGLAND.

SENDS A MESSAGE.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT ENOUGH ABOUT ME, FOLKS.

LET'S GET TO THE BIG NEWS,

ME.

YOU SEE BEFORE THE BREAK THE

FEC GAVE ME PERMISSION TO

FORM COLBERT SUPERPAC AND

COLLECT UNLIMITED DONATIONS.

WHEN I MERGED FROM THAT

CROWD MY G-STRING WAS

STUFFED WITH DOLLAR BILLS.

AND I WASN'T EVEN WEARING A

G-STRING WHEN I STARTED.

SO THANKS TO WHOEVER DONATED

THAT.

AND THE MEDIA REACTION HAS

BEEN OVERWHELMING.

WITH HEADLINES LIKE COLBERT

SUPERPAC PUSHES THE LIMITS

OF ELECTION LAW.

COLE PERT SUPERPAC GOOD FOR

GOVERNMENT AND GOOD FOR US,

AND COLBERT IS A SUPERPAC LA

BOEUF OVER TRANSFORMERS.

(APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: NO SURPRISE.

NO SURPRISE, MY SUPERPAC AND

THE TRANSFORMER SERIES HAVE

A LOT IN COMMON.

I CAN ALSO RAKE IN MILLIONS

OF DOLLARS FOR NO APPARENT

REASON.

SO --

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: FOLKS, HOGGING

THE SPACE A LITTLE BIT

THERE.

SO FOLKS IF YOU HAVE NOT

DONE SO ALREADY GO OVER TO

COLBERT SUPERPAC.COM AND

SIGN UP.

SO FAR OVER 94,000 OF YOU

HAVE BECOME MEMBERS.

AND TRUST ME, AND ONE PERSON

CLAP -- AND TRUST ME, NO, NO,

IT'S TOO LATE.

AND TRUST ME, I WILL ONLY

USE YOUR E-MAIL ADDRESSES

FOR GOOD.

YOU'LL BE BURIED UNDER AV AN

AVALANCHE OF SPAM NOT SEEN

SINCE THE 1968 EXPLOSION OF

THE HORMEL FACTORY.

(APPLAUSE)

NOW THE SUPREME COURT'S

DECISION IN THE CITIZENS

UNITED CASE ALLOWS FOR

UNLIMITED DONATIONS.

AND AS YOU CAN SEE, ON THE

COLBERT SUPERPAC TOTE BOARD

WE HAVE SO FAR RAISED

SOMEWHERE BETWEEN 100 AND

OUR GOAL OF INFINITE

DOLLARS.

(LAUGHTER)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: SO SOMEWHERE IN

HERE.

COME ON.

GUYS, LOOK AT THAT.

WE'RE SO CLOSE TO INFINITE

DOLLARS.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Stephen: SO GO TO COLBERT

SUPERPAC.COM.

BECOME A MEMBER AND DONATE

BECAUSE THERE ARE COUNTLESS

CONSERVATIVE ISSUES AND

CANDIDATES DESERVE THE KIND

OF SUPPORT THAT ONLY WE CAN

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