America's First Lesbian Throuple

  • Aired:  04/30/14
  •  | Views: 20,357

Antonin Scalia's argument that gay marriage is a slippery slope gains traction after a lesbian trio ties the knot in Massachusetts. (2:49)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK,

EVERYBODY, THANK YOU SOMUCH.

VERY NICE.

NATION, WE ALL KNOWAMERICA'S FLUSHING ITS

VALUES DOWN THE CRAPPER.

I MEAN DOES NO ONE READ THETOILET PAPER ONLY SIGN?

BUT EVEN I WASN'T PREPAREDFOR THE LATEST ALTITUDE DROP

ON AMERICA'S MORALFREE-FOR-ALL.

IN MASSACHUSETTS A LESBIANTRIO CLAIMS TO BE MARRIED,

CALLED THEMSELVES THEWORLD'S FIRST THROUPLE.

(LAUGHTER)EXCUSE ME, I JUST THROUPLED

A LITTLE BIT IN MY MOUTH.

(LAUGHTER)THIS IS A MASSIVE AFFRONT TO

TRADITIONAL MARRIAGE.

IT'S ADAM AND EVE, NOT MADAMAND EVE AND SHEILA.

(LAUGHTER)WORSE IT'S AN AFFRONT TO

TRADITIONAL THREESOMES WHICHARE A WEDGE THAT DRIVES

STRAIGHT COUPLES APART AFTERWHAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A

FUN BIRTHDAY PRESENTINEVITABLY LEADS TO CRYING

WHENEVER SOMEONE HEARS THENAME STACEY.

(LAUGHTER)NOW YOU MAY ASK YOURSELF,

AND I WOULD NOT BLAME YOU,YOU MIGHT BE SAYING TO

YOURSELF WHY AM I REPORTINGON THIS?

WELL, GREG, BECAUSE THROUPLEHOODIS CLEARLY AN EPIDEMIC

SPREADING FROM MASSACHUSETTSTO SEVERAL ARTICLES ABOUT

THIS HAPPENING INMASSACHUSETTS.

(LAUGHTER)ONE POINT MAKES A LINE.

AND IT'S ALL THE FAULT OFGAY MARRIAGE.

I AGREE WITH FOX NEWSCONTRIBUTOR AND DEFINITELY

NOT A LESBIAN TODD STARNESWHO RECENTLY FACEBOOKED WHEN

YOU REDEFINE MARRIAGE, IT'SANYTHING GOES.

AND THE WASHINGTON TIMESEDITORIAL BOARD WHO

EDITORIALED THIS WASFORETOLD WHEN THE SUPREME

COURT EVISCERATED AUTHENTICMARRIAGE LAST YEAR.

YES, THREE LESBIANS TOGETHERWAS FORETOLD BY THE SUPREME

COURT.

AND THE ENTIRE PORNINDUSTRY.

(LAUGHTER)AND FOR THE RECORD, THE

WARNINGS DID NOT START JUSTLAST YEAR.

ANTONIN SCALIA WAS THINKINGABOUT THREE LESBIANS WAY

BACK IN 2003 WHEN HE DISSENTEDIN LAWRENCE V TEXAS WHICH

STRUCK DOWN TEXAS'SANTI-SODOMY LAW SAYING THE

RULING, QUOTE, CALLED INTOQUESTION STATE LAWS AGAINST

BIGAMY, SAME-SEXMARRIAGE, ADULT INCEST,

PROSTITUTION, ADULTERY,FORNICATION, BESTIALITY AND

OBSCENITY.

YES, IT IS A SLIPPERY SLOPE.

SODOMY LEADS TO GAY MARRIAGEWHICH LEADS TO THROUPLING

WHICH INEVITABLY LEADS TOTHREE--- THREESTALLITY,

FIVENICATION AND WHATEVERWORD THEY COME UP WITH FOR

ONE DUDE AND TEN SNAKES IN ABOX.

I'M GOING TO SAY HISSY FIT?

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

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