Obama's Latino Panderfest

  • Aired:  05/12/11
  •  | Views: 43,463

President Obama's idea to secure the border with an alligator-filled moat sounds familiar and brilliant to Stephen. (3:04)

>> Stephen: WHOOO!

WHOOO!

>> STEPHEN, STEPHEN,

STEPHEN!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

STEPHEN, STEPHEN!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Stephen: WELCOME TO THE

REPORT.

THANK YOU FOR JOINING US.

NATION, BARACK OBAMA IS THE

WORST TYPE OF DEMOCRATIC

POLITICIAN.

AN EFFECTIVE ONE.

(LAUGHTER)

ON TUESDAY HE WAS DOWN IN EL

PASO, TEXAS, LAYING OUT HIS

PLAN FOR IMMIGRATION REFORM.

WHAT DOES BARACK OBAMA KNOW

ABOUT IMMIGRATION?

EVERYBODY KNOWS HE WAS BORN

IN AMERICA.

I HAVE PROOF.

(LAUGHTER)

BESIDES, THIS SPEECH WAS

ABOUT ONE THING ONLY --

>> IS THE PRESIDENT PUSHING

REAL REFORM OR IS HE

PANDERING FROM LATINO VOTES.

>> HE'S PANDZERING FOR VOTES

DOWN THERE.

>> IT'S PANDERING.

>> Stephen: A TOTAL LATINO

PANDERFEST.

EXCUSE ME, PANDER FIESTA.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Stephen: SHOW THEM, JIM.

>> WHEN I THINK ABOUT

IMMIGRATION, I THINK ABOUT

OPPORTUNITY.

INALIEN KBL RIGHTS, THE

AMERICAN FLAG, STATUE OF

LIBERTY, NATION OF

IMMIGRANTS, GUATEMALAN, YEW

CRANIAN, IRISH, ITALIAN,

POLISH, RUSSIAN, JEWISH.

PAPAO NEW GUINEA.

>> Stephen: JUST LISTEN TO

HIM PANDER TO THE ALL

IMPORTANT TEXAS LATTINO

PAPUA NEW GUINEA VOTE.

NEXT HE'S GOING TO BE OUT

THERE IN A BAMBOO PENIS

SHEATH EATING A SPANISH

EXPLORER.

WELCOME TO OBAMA'S AMERICA,

FOLKS.

AND TO KEEP THE PANDERMONIUM

GOING HE BASHED REPUBLICANS

OVERBOARDER SECURITY.

>> ALL THE STUFF THEY ASKED

FOR, WE'VE DONE.

THEY SAID WE NEEDED TO

TRIPLE THE BORDER PATROL.

WE'RE NOW THEY'RE GOING TO

SAY WE NEED TO QUADRUPLE THE

BORDER PATROL.

OR THEY'LL WANT A HIGHER

FENCE.

MAYBE THEY WILL NEED A MOAT.

MAYBE THEY WANT ALLIGATORS

IN THE MOAT.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Stephen: A MOAT WITH

ALLIGATORS, WHY DOES THAT

IDEA SOUND SO FAMILIAR AND

BRILLIANT TO ME?

>> WE NEED TWO WALLS, WE

FEED A MOAT.

A WANT A 20 FOOT HIGH WALL

2,000 MILES LONG YOU CAN SEE

FROM SPACE.

A MOAT.

>> I'M JUST SAYING A MOAT

WITH SOME ALLIGATORS IN IT.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

IT'S SAD.

THE PRESIDENT ISN'T JUST

WRITING MY COATTAILS HE'S

RIDING MY MOAT TAILS.

FRANKLY, THIS FITS THE

PATTERN FOR OBAMA.

HE STOLE MY IDEA FOR MOAT

GATORS JUST LIKE HE STOLE

PRESIDENT BUSH'S IDEA CONFI

KILLING CAN BIN LADEN.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Stephen: AND GEORGE

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